Best time to tell assistant you don’t need him anymore

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Feb 9, 2019
7
1
Situation: I coach a 10U travel and recreation team. My assistant coaches another recreation team. He was selected as the all star coach. He wants me to help. Our Spring travel season ends and we will have travel tryouts again for Fall season. He asked me to help coach recreation all stars. I’m not going to ask him to help in Fall and his daughter will not make the cut either. When do I tell him the bad news? Before all stars? After all stars? Or After Fall travel tryouts?
 
Nov 29, 2009
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If all the kids have to tryout then I would tell him after tryouts are over. That way you gave is DD a look see and she didn't make the cut. Anything else is premeditated.

Be sure he doesn't help with tryouts.
 
Jun 11, 2012
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I think you have to wait until after tryouts to cut his DD but you can talk to him about not coaching prior to that.
But telling him you aren’t taking his daughter prior to tryouts is not a good idea
 
May 4, 2016
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East Coast
The sooner the better. Give him as much advance notice as possible... Especially since he considers you a trustworthy friend based on his asking you to help coach All Stars.

Why? Because he will have his daughter trying out for only one team without advance notice. For her sake, he needs to know sooner than later. If not a straight "She ain't on the team next year", at least a "Dude, I gotta be honest. Your kid is 50/50 and you might want to keep other options open."
 

Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,855
113
I'm not real good at advising in situations like this. I'd tell him that we need to talk and get it done. She must not have talent since you have already decided to cut her. He must not bring much to the table since you want to release him. By being upfront, you enable them to go elsewhere early in the tryout process.

Keep in mind again that I am not good at giving advice. In fact, when I became the head baseball coach at the school I just retired from, as soon as I was told who my staff was, I had a meeting and told one of them that while I could not fire him since I inherited him, he would get after it or I'd send another assistant to help him. He quite that day. LOL
 
Jun 12, 2015
3,848
83
The sooner the better. Give him as much advance notice as possible... Especially since he considers you a trustworthy friend based on his asking you to help coach All Stars.

Why? Because he will have his daughter trying out for only one team without advance notice. For her sake, he needs to know sooner than later. If not a straight "She ain't on the team next year", at least a "Dude, I gotta be honest. Your kid is 50/50 and you might want to keep other options open."

I agree, because of the relationship there, and the fact that you have all the power. If he were just a parent whose daughter wanted to try out for your team then I'd say just tell him after tryouts. But with the coaching together, I think you should tell him as soon as you can. I wouldn't necessarily tell him you're going to cut his kid but maybe that you expect the team to be higher level than she's ready for and you recommend that he takes her to other tryouts.
 
Oct 4, 2018
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Just curious about a few things:

1. Is he a good assistant coach? Would you take his daughter but not him?
2. How do you know she won't make the team?
 
Jul 16, 2008
1,520
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Oregon
Just curious about a few things:

1. Is he a good assistant coach? Would you take his daughter but not him?
2. How do you know she won't make the team?

Agreed ^^^^

We have close to 5 kids on our team that have shown they weren't quite ready for this level. And while we know this, we don't know how many will show up to tryouts. So making your decision prior to tryouts... IDK.
 
Sep 29, 2014
2,421
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Is she THAT bad. or is your team a 10U A+ team. I guess it's just where you are from and the quality of rec all stars in your area but our rec all stars practiced every day for month and played in a travel tournament with A/B level teams as a tune up just before their all star journey, they did just fine held their own probably just a little better than middle of the pack. Everyone of those girls with maybe just the bottom couple girls could have played on any of those travel teams same was true for our 12U team.

Anyway if there is just no hope and you know you will have half a dozen girls that are better than her next year at the tryouts then fine cut the chord and now is the time. Do you not think that maybe with some more intense practice and working out next month with all stars she won't get better? Is the Dad just a jerk? Color me confused but if the girl is OK and Dad is good coach why won't you even consider them coming back next year or maybe you have already recruited girl and dad to take their place?

Where is the rest of the story..... and waiting until after fall tryouts that would be a terrible idea you leave them high and dry having not gone to other tryouts assuming they were on your team and the very least say that there is a lot of talent out there and that his DD might want to look at some other options beside just your team...
 
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