One of the reaons I love softball..

AndyS · Sep 11, 2018

While this TED talk is not softball related it talks about how we can raise girls to value bravery over perfection. I believe softball or any team sport can teach bravery and the fact life is imperfect. Twelve minutes but worth watching imo.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fC9da6eqaqg

Elk Grove Hurricane · Sep 11, 2018

I agree with you, but you said it backwards- value bravery over perfection.

Sparky Guy · Sep 11, 2018

Elk Grove Hurricane said:
I agree with you, but you said it backwards- value bravery over perfection.

When I'm working with young players I will tell them. "If you're going to make a mistake, make a BIG one. That way everyone knows you're trying!"

CoachJD · Sep 11, 2018

Sparky Guy said:
When I'm working with young players I will tell them. "If you're going to make a mistake, make a BIG one. That way everyone knows you're trying!"

I love that!

This talk really opened my eyes because for years now I've thought there was something wrong with me or maybe my girls were a special kind of afraid to fail.

I actually tell them I want them to make mistakes. I get really funny looks when I do that. But I stress to them that they will never learn their limits unless they take chances. I want every girl to get thrown out on the bases a time or two because she was too aggressive. That's how you learn your own speed, quickness, reaction time, etc. I want them striking out taking a big swing rather than grounding out to the pitcher. I would rather my OF let a ball get past her for extra bases because she was going all out than playing every ball into a single because she's afraid to go for it.

And when they make a mistake for the first time, I always ask them if they know what they did wrong. I want them to tell me. If they have to process their own mistake, they're more likely to grow from it. And if they don't get screamed at, they're more likely to take chances in the future.

AndyS · Sep 12, 2018

Elk Grove Hurricane said:
I agree with you, but you said it backwards- value bravery over perfection.

I did say it backwards! I fixed it in the original post and thank you for calling it out so I could fix it.

Chris8 · Sep 12, 2018

CoachJD said:
I love that!

This talk really opened my eyes because for years now I've thought there was something wrong with me or maybe my girls were a special kind of afraid to fail.

I actually tell them I want them to make mistakes. I get really funny looks when I do that. But I stress to them that they will never learn their limits unless they take chances. I want every girl to get thrown out on the bases a time or two because she was too aggressive. That's how you learn your own speed, quickness, reaction time, etc. I want them striking out taking a big swing rather than grounding out to the pitcher. I would rather my OF let a ball get past her for extra bases because she was going all out than playing every ball into a single because she's afraid to go for it.

And when they make a mistake for the first time, I always ask them if they know what they did wrong. I want them to tell me. If they have to process their own mistake, they're more likely to grow from it. And if they don't get screamed at, they're more likely to take chances in the future.

Couldn't agree more! We ask our girls to "fail fantastically". Funny thing....the failures become less and the amazing plays continue to grow. As our team has embraced failing fantastically the girls actually encourage each other more and it's created a very positive culture. Instead of girls dropping heads because they made a mistake....the team is cheering them on for their extra effort. We used to have only one OF who would even attempt a sliding catch (appropriate time)...and now everyone on the team is attempting it (again appropriate time)

bmakj · Sep 12, 2018

Sparky Guy said:
When I'm working with young players I will tell them. "If you're going to make a mistake, make a BIG one. That way everyone knows you're trying!"

I usually go with "if you are going to fail, fail spectacularly", mostly when she was a GK in soccer (ie go for the diving save, come out and challenge, etc.), but it applies really to anything, like try for that diving catch in OF rather than let it bounce in front

bmakj · Sep 12, 2018

CoachJD said:
I love that!

This talk really opened my eyes because for years now I've thought there was something wrong with me or maybe my girls were a special kind of afraid to fail.

I actually tell them I want them to make mistakes. I get really funny looks when I do that. But I stress to them that they will never learn their limits unless they take chances. I want every girl to get thrown out on the bases a time or two because she was too aggressive. That's how you learn your own speed, quickness, reaction time, etc. I want them striking out taking a big swing rather than grounding out to the pitcher. I would rather my OF let a ball get past her for extra bases because she was going all out than playing every ball into a single because she's afraid to go for it.

And when they make a mistake for the first time, I always ask them if they know what they did wrong. I want them to tell me. If they have to process their own mistake, they're more likely to grow from it. And if they don't get screamed at, they're more likely to take chances in the future.

especially at younger ages, because in all honestly, 10 years from now, who will remember coming first place in some mid may tournament. but they may have developed outstanding judgement and skills, and even more importantly, a go for it attitude which can help them in all sorts of areas. playing and competing and growing as an athlete is not really about how great an athlete/player they become, it is about what they take from the game into other parts of their lives

dbronstein · Sep 12, 2018

Sparky Guy said:
When I'm working with young players I will tell them. "If you're going to make a mistake, make a BIG one. That way everyone knows you're trying!"

Along the same lines, I tell them "make a decision and go all out with it. It's better to do the wrong thing than to do nothing because you can't decide."

I know that a lot of times it's better to do nothing, but we're talking about young players and I'd much rather see them try to do something.

One of the reaons I love softball..

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AndyS

Elk Grove Hurricane

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AndyS

Chris8

bmakj

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