Parent complaints after Game #1

Welcome to Discuss Fastpitch

Your FREE Account is waiting to the Best Softball Community on the Web.

Oct 11, 2010
8,337
113
Chicago, IL
I have never signed one of those, wife has if forced.

Personally I would rather have parent complain then stewing in the stands.

DD fights her own battles now, HS parents should not be getting involved in game decisions. If I have an Issue with something it would be at an AD or higher level.
 
May 17, 2012
2,804
113
Distance yourself from the parents the best you can. You can't have parents approaching you or your coaching staff after games for whatever reason.

Just my two cents.
 

TMD

Feb 18, 2016
433
43
To quote the coach from the movie All Stars, "I wish I coached a team of girls whose parents were all dead."

While I absolutely agree that a pre-season parents meeting where you can lay out the rules and expectations is important, don't be fooled into thinking that it will magically end parent complaints. At best, you'll be able to say "We clearly discussed this at the pre-season meeting...we do not talk about playing time with parents."
 

Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,854
113
We did have a parent meeting with a handbook given to each family. The last page was a disclaimer saying that player and parent had read the handbook to be handed in signed by player parent and I would sign it also.

The interesting part was each player had approached me during the day to ask what they could do to play more. They (players) acted in a mature manor for underclassmen. I felt they left with a better understanding of our expectation.

What was the negative for parents if they violated the agreement that they signed? Having players sign it is one thing and parents another. Expect a herd now after every game. I'm a little more abrupt than most. Had parents approached me to complain, ... well if I type what I would have done and have done, people would dislike me even more. LOL
 
Oct 3, 2009
372
18
Last year on JV I was worried my DD 3 wasn't getting enough innings in the circle. We even made arrangements for DD 3 to pitch for JV 2 when JV wasn't playing.

Then, the other JV pitcher went up to varsity (where she didn't pitch), and suddenly my DD 3 was pitching every inning of almost every game. Then TB season after that. By the end of TB season, her arm was pretty much dead. DD 3 almost quit pitching after that. This year she left her HS team rather than risk blowing out her arm on JV. One girl who had a similar experience had surgery after TB season.
(There were some other reasons why DD 3 left that team, but that is in a separate thread).

I am just curious how many innings a week your DD3 was throwing on JV when it was not enough? And then how many when it was too many? I am honestly asking because in our area in HS if you were the #1 you pitched pretty much every game and every inning.

Andy
 
Jul 16, 2013
4,659
113
Pennsylvania
First of all, I respect all of you out there that are willing to be high school coaches. From what I have seen throughout DD's high school career, it is not a position I would want. And although I'm sure it varies from region to region, the high school softball coaches in our area do not get paid very well. They definitely do not get paid enough to deal with all of the drama, etc.

As a new coach to the scene, unfortunately I am afraid that some parents are going to look at you as "fresh meat". They will test what they can get away with until you make the expectations known. Parent meetings are good, but they will only do so much. Some parents will still try to push things until they determine where the line is drawn in the sand. And the consequences of any agreement are only as good as the backing you have from the AD and school board. I have seen a coach following such an agreement only to be overruled by the AD once the 'letters to the editor' reached a certain level. I do agree with others, that the way you handle these early challenges will determine how many challenges you will face moving forward. Best of luck!
 
Oct 11, 2010
8,337
113
Chicago, IL
DD did not pitch at all because of mommy ball until she hit school.

She pitched every stinking innimg.

They did start another P, she did not get out of 1st inning. Back to DD.

Could she do it yes, but she was not ready for it and her arm was ready to fall off.

I am not sure if DD said something to coach but I told her I was going to and she got a brief break.
 
Jan 30, 2018
252
0
SE Michigan
I have never signed one of those, wife has if forced.

Personally I would rather have parent complain then stewing in the stands.

DD fights her own battles now, HS parents should not be getting involved in game decisions. If I have an Issue with something it would be at an AD or higher level.

My daughter has never played for an organization that didn't have some sort of expectations for the parents that needed to be signed. It is pretty much common sense/show a little class/ don't be an a-hole kinda stuff. Not sure why anyone would have a problem signing something like that? Was there something on your parent agreement you didn't like that made you not sign?

It's my experience that parents will stew in the stands whether they talk to the coach or not. The truth hurts and sometimes they stew more after they talk to the coach.

You let your daughter fight her battles but would go to the AD or "higher" over school ball? Wow, things must be different in school ball where you are at? Many TB players/parents here treat school ball as a glorified rec league to get some swings and play with friends. They usually can't wait for it to be over so they can get back to their TB teams. Many of them ask to play different positions than where they play TB just for the fun of it. The school I work at has a pitcher in softball and a SS in baseball that are playing D1 next year. The pitcher is more interested in getting to bat than pitching, since she won't be hitting much in college. The baseball player had to be talked into playing at all.
 
Oct 11, 2010
8,337
113
Chicago, IL
Boy, I got jumped on.

I do not sign it because it means nothing.

The AD or higher was there has to be a bigger issue, not playing time, that I need to get involved in.
 
Oct 5, 2017
214
43
Western Indiana
Obviously there is no "meaning" in signing or not signing an agreement. I like to have it that says they read it. That way if there is an issue later then we can use it as a resource to why we do things the way we do.

We are talking about a program that had parents in the dugout last year with players on their cell phones during the game. It was a lack of discipline that needed corrected. When you lay out expectations then no one is in shock when they happen. We have coaches' expectations also listed in the handbook. Just basic stuff.
 

Forum statistics

Threads
42,830
Messages
679,478
Members
21,445
Latest member
Bmac81802
Top