HS coaches and theory

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Dec 2, 2013
3,409
113
Texas
For whatever reason my DD seems to be singled out as a punching bag for the HS coaches. She is a Jr and in all reality a leader on the team, but the coaches give her a hard time no matter what she does. They tell her to dial it back and when she does, they tell her she needs to be more intense. They snap at her for cheering too loudly! Really? Last night, she is playing SS (normally C) and there was an in between Pop fly in short LF. If she makes the play, it would have a been spectacular, but it dropped in for a single and of course the runner is a burner and gets to 2nd base. The LF lolly gags the throw. She comes into the dugout and is told that she is benched! Meanwhile 3 girls made multiple routine errors and they are left in. The team they are playing made it to the 4th round of the state playoffs last year and is pre seasoned ranked #6 in the area. And we suck. We lose 16-1 in 3 innings. Not a surprise.

My DD is the only committed player on the team at this point. I have a conspiracy theory. Future college coach asked for HS coach contact information a few weeks ago. I wonder if the coach asked HS coach to bench her to see how she reacts. This sounds crazy, but it's the only thing that actually makes sense. What do y'all think???

DD needs to learn how to handle adversity. If the conversation comes up with the HS coach, I told her to say I'll try harder next time. Hey Coach, what can I do to help the team get better? Hey Coach, how can I make your job easier? Be a servant leader! Life skills.
 

JAD

Feb 20, 2012
8,231
38
Georgia
I always told my DD not to let coaches riding her bother her, because when the coaches are riding you they think you can do better. When the stop riding you they have given up. The fact that my DD was convinced I had turrets when I coached her at 12U and 14U also helped! LOL
Coaches riding players.jpg
 
Sep 29, 2014
2,421
113
Just tell her to keep doing her best and maintain the positive attitude no matter what...you simply can't control what other people are going to do.

So how did she react??
 

Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,854
113
True happiness for a player is the moment when they embrace the statement, "Control what you can control" and play the game.
 
Jul 16, 2013
4,659
113
Pennsylvania
True happiness for a player is the moment when they embrace the statement, "Control what you can control" and play the game.

^^^^ Exactly. Unfortunately these things are going to happen. My DD is in a similar situation. She is the only travel ball player on a team with a great deal of inexperience (I'm trying to be nice...). One of the best players was unable to practice because she was unable to find her glove. Apparently she sat it in the garage after the last high school game last May and has not touched it since. Now that it is time for practice, she is unable to find it. So I understand where Orange Socks is coming from. DD is not treated in the same manner, however. She doesn't have to worry about getting benched for something like that. However, it is clear that the coaches expect a higher standard out of her. Part of her role on the team is to raise the level of the other players. Whether by her actions, her words, or a combination of both. In many cases she is either used as the example during drills, or asked to help teach the drills. It's hard to say why your coach acted in this way, but it may have had nothing to do with your DD. Rather, it may have been to send a message to the rest of the team by using your DD as an example. By the sounds of it, having your DD in that particular game, probably wasn't going to impact the outcome one way or the other.
 

Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,854
113
^^^^ Exactly. Unfortunately these things are going to happen. My DD is in a similar situation. She is the only travel ball player on a team with a great deal of inexperience (I'm trying to be nice...). One of the best players was unable to practice because she was unable to find her glove. Apparently she sat it in the garage after the last high school game last May and has not touched it since. Now that it is time for practice, she is unable to find it. So I understand where Orange Socks is coming from. DD is not treated in the same manner, however. She doesn't have to worry about getting benched for something like that. However, it is clear that the coaches expect a higher standard out of her. Part of her role on the team is to raise the level of the other players. Whether by her actions, her words, or a combination of both. In many cases she is either used as the example during drills, or asked to help teach the drills. It's hard to say why your coach acted in this way, but it may have had nothing to do with your DD. Rather, it may have been to send a message to the rest of the team by using your DD as an example. By the sounds of it, having your DD in that particular game, probably wasn't going to impact the outcome one way or the other.

I don't know if this helps or not. I once coached a tremendous athlete. I don't really think of him as a baseball player at first. He moved in and was atypical for what we were used to coaching. He just didn't fit in for many reasons. I'll leave that alone. Anyway, he was messing up some and I told him to get into my car where I went after him. We got out of the car and finished practice. I didn't get after him the rest of the practice. One player who had played for me a couple of years wanted to talk to me about that incident. He said that I treated this young man differently than I had treated all others. I asked this player if his baseball career ended that day would he be ok for the rest of his life knowing that he was done with what baseball had to offer him. He said yes. I pointed out that for him to be successful he didn't need baseball. Then I pointed out that we didn't need that kid but that kid needed baseball more than any other player on the team and that if I lost him, he was lost.

Fair doesn't exist. I know for some you might not think that right. I have expectations for all of my players and I know them. Some I can push and push hard. Some I can't. Some will never have a positive thing in their lives like softball after they leave this program. Some will be successful no matter what. I hope that this rambling makes sense.
 
May 17, 2012
2,804
113
I always told my DD not to let coaches riding her bother her, because when the coaches are riding you they think you can do better. When the stop riding you they have given up. The fact that my DD was convinced I had turrets when I coached her at 12U and 14U also helped! LOL
View attachment 12630







Yes because the young black athlete needs the wisdom of the old white guy to succeed.

You have to be kidding me with that meme/picture.
 

JAD

Feb 20, 2012
8,231
38
Georgia
Yes because the young black athlete needs the wisdom of the old white guy to succeed.

You have to be kidding me with that meme/picture.

Some of the best college coaches in the country coaching some of the best athletes in the country and you want to make it about race? You must be a lot of fun at parties!
 
Jul 16, 2013
4,659
113
Pennsylvania
Some of the best college coaches in the country coaching some of the best athletes in the country and you want to make it about race? You must be a lot of fun at parties!

You know. I looked at that same picture. What I saw was a "football coach" and a "football player". The thought of race never even entered my mind. Perception is a funny thing...
 

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