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Thread: Lazy Kid

  1. #1
    I can talk softball all day YoungBuck's Avatar
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    Default Lazy Kid

    Anyone 'pull their funding' from their DD when they don't or won't put in the time required to improve?.. by funding I mean instruction or other expenses.

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    I can talk softball all day #7sDad's Avatar
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    We won't go to a hitting lesson unless she's put in her work since the last one. She knows this and usually does a good job, but sometimes school and other commitments make it difficult. But I wouldn't say it's lazy.

    However, we did pull piano lessons from both her and her brother. They just wouldn't practice. It's not a matter of lazy, but whether they have a passion and genuine interest driven by themselves and not the parent.
    Donít practice until you get it right. Practice until you canít get it wrong.

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    I eat, sleep and breathe softball quincy's Avatar
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    DD has done both group and individual pitching lessons. If she does group lessons I do not care what she does.

    If she does individual lessons she is required to practice at least once between lessons. More a sign of respect for coach then anything else.

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    Always learning... Eric F's Avatar
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    I have told both of my DDs that I will fund their activities (within reason) if they put in the time and effort. My older DD has bounced around to a bunch of different things, and never really dedicated herself to becoming good at anything. We had my younger DD (Maddie) taking piano lessons at a fairly early age, but her willingness to practice faded, and the lessons stopped quickly after. She is currently learning how to play the guitar (mostly on her own, despite my having played since HS), and has put in enough effort to it that she will be getting her first guitar of her own later this month. As for softball, sometimes Maddie's motivation to practice outside of team practices and private lessons is less than I think she should be doing, but overall, she continues to be dedicated to her journey towards playing college ball, so I keep driving and writing checks.
    A TB parent's life...Drive. Write checks. Eat tacos.

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    I can talk softball all day dbronstein's Avatar
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    I agree that it's not so much being lazy as having the commitment. I'm happy to pay to pay for lessons/coaching for whatever as long as the kids are committed to the activity. If I have to bug them to practice, then forget about it.

    DD is currently seeing pitching and hitting coaches and has been taking initiative to practice in between lessons. DS did baseball hitting and pitching last year, then at the last minute decided he didn't want to go out for the HS team (after participating in the off-season workouts with them). I made him pay me back some money, enough that he felt it.

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    Ex "Expert" Cannonball's Avatar
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    YoungBuck, naturally, I don't know your dd. Please be careful with the "lazy" label. I've found that some players struggle with human nature. Human nature most often dictates that a person take the easy route. That looks like lazy. There are times when people/players are really afraid of what might happen if they are successful. For the parent, there is that sense of being upset or angry or ... when they don't see a player getting after it as they think the player should. Some players will eventually find that button and take off and some won't. Improvement has to be measured on their expectations. You can't determine a player's dreams or your dd's dreams. Instead, you can be honest with your dd, let her know that playing and instruction depends upon a certain criteria and that you support her either way. Good luck!
    My opinions here are simply that, My Opinions. I'm an ex expert. I no longer care to have to be right.

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    I can talk softball all day CoachJD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cannonball View Post
    YoungBuck, naturally, I don't know your dd. Please be careful with the "lazy" label. I've found that some players struggle with human nature. Human nature most often dictates that a person take the easy route. That looks like lazy. There are times when people/players are really afraid of what might happen if they are successful. For the parent, there is that sense of being upset or angry or ... when they don't see a player getting after it as they think the player should. Some players will eventually find that button and take off and some won't. Improvement has to be measured on their expectations. You can't determine a player's dreams or your dd's dreams. Instead, you can be honest with your dd, let her know that playing and instruction depends upon a certain criteria and that you support her either way. Good luck!
    In addition to "what might happen if they are successful," there's also the kid who is afraid of what might happen if she gives 110% and fails.

    I have a player who can be great. And I know she wants to be. But she's the type that has everything come easy (good athlete, good student, etc). She can be pretty good without trying so hard, and if she does fail, it's because she didn't try. But if she tries and fails? Well, that just might be the end of the entire world.

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    Softball Junkie pattar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CoachJD View Post
    In addition to "what might happen if they are successful," there's also the kid who is afraid of what might happen if she gives 110% and fails.

    I have a player who can be great. And I know she wants to be. But she's the type that has everything come easy (good athlete, good student, etc). She can be pretty good without trying so hard, and if she does fail, it's because she didn't try. But if she tries and fails? Well, that just might be the end of the entire world.
    Not a Jordan fan growing up (Bird was the word ) but respected him..below link is relevant to not only sports but life. For every good research idea I have had there were 20 others which were failures..

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JA7G7AV-LT8
    Last edited by pattar; 12-06-2017 at 09:36 PM.

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    I can talk softball all day #7sDad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dbronstein View Post
    DS did baseball hitting and pitching last year, then at the last minute decided he didn't want to go out for the HS team (after participating in the off-season workouts with them). I made him pay me back some money, enough that he felt it.
    ^^^ I love it. Lessons in reality.

    My DD is more of a procrastinator. Last week she got invited to attend an event tomorrow by the Chairperson of the major she's considering at one of her top school choices. (btw, the softball coach at this school loves her). I've asked her at least 4 times for the address, because I need to rearrange my work schedule to take her, since I normally take the train to work... and also miss my company holiday party. It's going to be an interesting day tomorrow when she misses a great opportunity because I don't change my work schedule at the last minute for her.
    Donít practice until you get it right. Practice until you canít get it wrong.

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    Softball Junkie pattar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by #7sDad View Post
    .. and also miss my company holiday party.
    Because I would now have an excuse to do this ^^^^ I would do the legwork myself and just
    go by myself and tell them I was a continuing education student.. Of course my holiday
    "parties" involve a bunch of Engineering professors, most who think they sh*t ice cream
    so your parties may be more fun...

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