Committing to a team

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Nov 4, 2015
320
43
Sorry for the long post. Promise I wont do this again. Am i a lone idiot here in that I have had anxiety(I guess that's what you call it) and sleeplessness over making a decision with my wife and DD on who she will play for? She's not even 12. Turned down a team that DD made, but would have been in bottom 3-4 and DD wanted to pitch so said she wanted to stay with old team. Old team tryouts were held on a Saturday. Decided after not hearing anything by the next week that we would go to a tryout my DD was invited to. Two of her friends went as well. All sure DD and friends would make their old team, but being the only 12's, not sure how rest of team would look. Girls had great tryout. Really impressed with coaches and head of the organization. All three were offered a spot. DD and her friends really wanted to play for new team after only knowing their old team and organization for the last 2 years (only team/org they had played for). Now i can't sleep while knowing i would have to make the phone call to the org DD was no longer going to play for. Friends with the man in charge and really don't like change in general. Made the call and it went well, but know it was a surprise and they were disappointed, as we were not planning on changing. Feel really bad even though i know we are making the right decision based on the information we have right now. May not work out for some reason 6 months from now(can't see the future), but still believe the decision is right. New org has been around for 6-7 years and has 10u through 18u teams. Is this normal, or am i turning into a middle-aged pansy?(wife would argue i have always been a pansy, just now making it into the middle-aged part) DD took a couple of pitching lessons from the young lady that is coaching the team she is not going back with. Worry we are messing up that relationship too. Just seems crazy when I step back and think about this amount of stress over little girl's softball. DD is happy, DW is happy. I'm stressed. Sounds about normal i guess....
 
Jun 11, 2012
741
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You have to do what feels right for your family. If it doesn't work out with the old pitching coach there are plenty others out there.
 
Jun 29, 2013
589
18
No, you're going through what a lot of people experience. It's hard to leave an organization that you genuinely like, there were reasons why you went with the original organization in the first place and your sense of loyalty is clearly pretty strong. But think of it this way- if you said no to this new opportunity which you believe is the better choice for your DD, you would probably spend the fall season (and maybe longer) wondering what you're missing. Maybe this doesn't work out but it probably will help your DD grow and you can still maintain good relationships if you don't burn any bridges with the other team.
 
Sep 29, 2014
2,421
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Completely normal but sounds like you did the right thing not burning any bridges and being upfront about what was going on. Jump in and make the best of it with your team.
 
Nov 4, 2015
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tried not to burn any bridges. was asked why and was honest with my friend. Not critical at all of the coach or the organization. Expressed the concerns we had that helped shape our decision. Good people and seem to understand it isn't personal at all. Just trying to do what is best of DD. Hope it all works out. Now to get a good nights sleep.
 
May 22, 2015
410
28
Illinois
I remember stressing the first time DD decided to play for a different team. I was AC on her previous team and friends with the other coaches & parents. I didn't want things to linger on, so told the other coaches we were leaving about a week after our season ended. They were a little shocked, but I explained the reasons we were leaving and they understood. It was nothing personal at all. It really turned out not to be a big deal. Still friends with them and DD guest plays for them occasionally.
 
Jul 14, 2017
181
28
Definitely not the lone idiot! It is stressful being on a team that is not the right fit for your dd. It is stressful researching teams and narrowing the list down and it is then stressful to decide what offer to go with! If I read your post correctly- you didn't hear from the original team even a week after tryouts??? That is not just stressful but rude! Good for your daughter to keep her options open and in finding a better fit!


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Screwball
Dec 18, 2014
512
63
It's stressful! We changed teams this year for the first time after 4 years with the same team. We definitely lost sleep over it. And we were lucky enough to be able to visit the new team and meet the girls and even travel with them for Nationals. Even after all that it was a tough decision! But we made it. And I don't think our new team is as talented as the old team! But we know the coaches are better and we feel it will be a better opportunity in the long run. I know some other people married to their organization and it will hamper their kids if they don't get divorced. Make the decision, move on, and see what comes of it. Sometime the grass is greener! And never burn your bridges.
 
Jun 12, 2015
3,848
83
We've been there. You do what's best for kid, and you just have to be honest with the old org people. This happens ALL the time. It's just part of it.
 
Oct 3, 2011
3,478
113
Right Here For Now
The best advice you'll get is to relax. This isn't a life or death decision. Even of more significance is that it's a decision about a game. The worst thing that can happen is you'll realize your family made a mistake that will cost you a little bit of money when you leave. Even if you would decide or have to leave mid-season, your DD could pick up and sub for the rest of the season for other teams. A wrong decision will not jeopardize anything of significance.
 

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