looking for advice on how to keep positive

obbay said:

Pattar- I think this will be a goal of our team this summer- to play whiffle ball!

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Team after season party, glow stick wiffle ball after dark. Kids against the parents. Most fun we have ever had at a team party.

chinamigarden said:

Team after season party, glow stick wiffle ball after dark. Kids against the parents. Most fun we have ever had at a team party.

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Who Won? Do not tell me the score didn't matter. We are older and bigger, plus cheat to make it even.

pattar said:

Agreed. Best time I had playing baseball growing up was unorganized. Wiffle ball, speedball, stickball, self-toss HR derby, etc. Used to play
at the neighborhood elementary school playground, worst field you could imagine but we didn't care. Good carefree times with friends.

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Agreed. That is why I love the movie "The Sandlot". Unable to replace memories/feeling of being a kid and playing ball. I think that movie captures the feeling. I hope that my DD looks back on playing softball since she was 9 and has those kind of memories.

Buy your daughter the book, "Play Big". It is a mental training book that addresses slumps and how to overcome the negative thoughts & feelings.


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maksoftball said:

Could have written your post! DD is a senior and has experienced much of what you describe about your DD. Beginning of season, she hit .600-.700 (including 7 hr), dropped down to just below .300. The mental struggle is real, and her PC/HC said that her mechanics are great - she just needs to get out of her head. She recognizes this now but letting go has been hard for her type A personality. We are coming to a close on the season (in playoffs), and I think she's finally embracing that the end is near and wants to have fun and enjoy it. And she did in last Saturday's games with lots of aggressive base running (legs are black and blue) - she was grinning from ear to ear. It will come - just avoid stressing it and encourage her to have fun because HS doesn't last forever. Make new memories while digging in the heels and giving your all. Easier said than done, I know...the mental factor is a HUGE obstacle and one of the hardest things to overcome - and you really don't overcome it - it's a constant battle.

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Opposing coaches/pitchers may have made an adjustment in how they are pitching to your DD. If your DD hit 7 HRs in preseason off screwballs/inside pitches, how many of those do you think she will see during the regular season?

JAD said:

Opposing coaches/pitchers may have made an adjustment in how they are pitching to your DD. If your DD hit 7 HRs in preseason off screwballs/inside pitches, how many of those do you think she will see during the regular season?

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Wish that were true - opposing coaches in our district are not that smart LOL (except for maybe 2 schools where coaches are former players). Her timing got jacked when she mentally went off the train tracks after accepting she wouldn't be going to the school she wanted to go to (offered no academic money). She's finally coming around and "staying back" on pitches - now she just needs to get it just right again. She realizes that it's a constant battle but she will prevail.

interesting update- pitching well lessens the pain! good game in the circle last night and even though hitting wasn't great, the pitching dominance kept things positive! 1 for 3 including a SAC fly that scored 2 runs. I think the hitting problem will dissipate soon.

Opposing coaches/pitchers may have made an adjustment in how they are pitching to your DD.

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interesting side note- as a pitcher, DD's coaches won't let her do this. she sees a sign come in that she knows this batter will jack, but she's not allowed to shake it off. she has a good attitude about it in that the batters "response" always vindicates her intuition.

One of my HS age hitting students was struggling early in the year, coming back after an ACL injury last spring left her hobbled and unable to do much until early spring. Although she'd been cleared to play, she just couldn't find the groove. It didn't help that there is a peanut gallery at her games that not only express their opinions there but like to call out girls on Facebook as well. She is really a stud as a hitter and catcher, but she was carrying a lot of baggage with her to the plate.

The way she turned it around was she finally said to herself, "I just don't care." As in she doesn't care what other people think, or what the outcomes are, or whether she's doing as well as last year or whatever. She cleared her mind, got rid of the baggage, and lo and behold she's hit four dingers in her last three games, has been racking up RBIs like crazy, and her OBP and OPS are through the roof. She didn't change her swing - she just started using it with abandon.

It's easy to get caught up in all the negative, and sometimes tough to get out of it. But the best way to make it happen is to quit worrying about all the external stuff and just go up there and do your thing. As I always say, if you're going to fail, fail doing your best - not trying to conform to what someone else thinks you should be doing.

A few suggestions.

I bought DD the book "The Secret" It's a amazing read that centers on positive thoughts and how they attract success. Works!

Another book I am going to pick up for her is "Chase the Lion". It's the book the girls at Ole Miss have been reading. It speaks to how to set your dreams higher than you ever thought possible.

One thing that I have done with DD ever since she began to play competitive travel is to force her to still play REC.
DD is 13 and we have a 18U Rec team in our area. Now that DD plays "A" level ball she sees studs every practice and game. That can be overwhelming but her going to a REC game where she is top of the top gives her some momentary confidence. I think that is important for kids.