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Mar 8, 2016
313
63
DD's journey
At 9 years old she made me take her to the field for practice if the coach cancelled one of th 2x a day practices for the all star tournament.
At 10 years old she said she wanted to play in high school and we decided we would get her on a travel team so she would be able to compete with the other girls who are playing travel when she got to high school
At 11 years old she said her goal was to play in college(neither dd or her parents understood what this meant
At 12 years old she had the same goal
At 13 years old she had the same goal
At 14 years old she her attention span was one text message long. She didn't want to plan anything longer than 5 minutes into the future
At 15 years old she again wants to play in college and is doing the the work to try and make it happen

When I look back 20 years from now I am sure I will cherish the time spent with dd practicing. She used to beg me to schedule time at an indoor facility over winter and I would take her even when I was to tired after work. I am glad I spent ever minute I did. She had a great start to her freshman year of high school ball but the last 2 games she has only hit one ball hard. She was mad because the coach called out the middle of the order after last night's game for not doing their job. I told her she could be mad or she could work on her swing. She had me out putting balls on the tee till 11pm. Even if she doesn't hit well next game I am proud of the choice she made to work hard instead of being upset with the coach. My advice is to offer to practice with her. Practice ever time she wants too. Enjoy ever minute of it. They grow up fast.
 
Jan 25, 2011
2,282
38
It's a fire inside some kids and others it is just having fun. My dd when she was 9 yo told me she wanted to play in college. We started hitting and pitching lessons and went from there. When my dd turned 13 yo she had an accident had to have brain surgery. She was 3 months in her recovery and she wanted to start pitching again and hitting off the tee. Two years without stepping on a field to play with a team. She started playing again on a 16u TB team. She will be graduating high school this year, finish this summer on her 18u TB team and will be playing in college. She followed her passion, but if she decided to have done something else, I would of been right there pushing her to follow that dream.
 

Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,855
113
The wife and I used to take the kid out and tell her to dominate. We hoped that the cattle prod would be used sparingly. We especially liked those dugouts that had the chain link fence on the back so that we didn't have to hit her as she ran around and out those block dugout entrances. Stick the cattle prod through the chain link fence and watch a dugout clear. LOL We would dangle food at times behind the backstop to give her the idea that if she dominated in the circle, she might get to eat. Then again, I love eating and so, she caught on early that I was probably going to eat that food. We may have gone too far when we told her that she once had an older brother but he didn't compete the way we wanted him to. Of course we didn't have a son. It was her older sister that she never knew.

Then again, maybe we just told he we loved her and wanted her to have fun. We never had to push her. She was self driven and at times I considered that a curse. You already know where your dd stands with regards to those others around her at her age. Help her the best you can but let her have success and failure on her terms. Good luck!
 

JAD

Feb 20, 2012
8,231
38
Georgia
I pushed hard until she was 15 and it wore me out. DD and I had a talk, I told her I was pushing her because I wanted it for her. I told her that she needed to want it for herself, if that was indeed what she wanted. From that point forward, I let her tell me when she wanted to practice, I wasn't going to beg her to do it. A switch flipped for her and she took ownership of her own training. That was three years ago. We talk a lot because we spend so much time together practicing. She's as much as said she wouldn't be where she is now without my pushing her in the early years. So, I don't know if there is a one size fits all answer. I do think I pushed too hard, and I caused a lot of stress on the family because of it. If I had it to do over, I'd probably push her, but not be such a jerk about it and try and make the process more fun and enjoyable. I can't tell you how many times her mother had to play referee and separate us.

This^^^^, except DW was pushing too, so DD knew she had to work hard or quit. As a family we were not going to commit the time, effort and money to high level TB if DD was not going to give 110%. The right amount of "push" is different for everyone, it is not one size fits all.
 
Dec 11, 2010
4,713
113
This^^^^, except DW was pushing too, so DD knew she had to work hard or quit. As a family we were not going to commit the time, effort and money to high level TB if DD was not going to give 110%. The right amount of "push" is different for everyone, it is not one size fits all.

Did what both JAD and Knight said. Timing is everything.

I'll add that as a parent I work harder at "catching them doing something right" than anything else. Not blowing sunshine up their butt but more of a quiet "good job on that" when no one else can hear it. When you get serious about this softball thing it will be a grind. Let them know you noticed that they worked hard and what went well. It makes it a lot easier to have the tougher conversations about what isn't going so well. And for the love of God, don't get offended when they don't want to talk about softball or just want to be left alone on the ride home from workout/practice/game. Pull not push etc.
 
Jul 14, 2010
150
18
Best advice we got as parents from our AD - release her to the game. There's a lot of life between 11 and college.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

obbay

Banned
Aug 21, 2008
2,199
0
Boston, MA
DD is 17 and I remembered the other day that she used to always hound me to catch for her so she could pitch. I'd be tired from work and she wanted to go out and pitch before it got dark. I would always do it.

that stopped when she got to HS and was practicing every day.

I miss those days....


(Home plate and pitching plate are still painted in the driveway from her even younger days, but are fading...)
 
Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
My DD is only 7 so I guess I may not be qualified to respond here. However I played college baseball and I can share my experience as well as what I see with my daughter. At the younger ages (<10 or 11?) more often than not they just enjoy
being with Dad/Mom. I remember this being the case with me and it seems that way with my DD. They like the routine of going to the field and then going for a treat afterwards or hitting in the garage and then having Dad
do the "secret handshake" after a good session. You can also tell fairly easy when they are not into that day..at that age they can't fake it very well. Probably best to shut it down for the day if that is the case.
At about 12 or 13 I remember something clicking in me and I was the one who started to push. If my father couldn't throw to me or hit grounders to me, I would hunt down a friend to take BP with.
I would rotate friends because if I didn't they would burn out. However I did this more than likely because I was having success and connected the work with the success...being good at something is fun. However without the early work
that success more than likely would not have been there. Whether or not my DD (or my DS when gets to that point..he is only 2 now) I have no idea but I hope she does because the idea that with hard work comes success is a good
lesson to learn regardless of what you are doing.
 
Jul 17, 2008
488
0
Southern California
Hi guys and gals,
I have not posted here in a looong time! My daughter just graduated from college last year, She played softball at a small mid-level division 1 school.
Started playing at 5, switched from rec to travel at 12U. Verballed at the start of her Sophomore year in High School.

All kids are different but one thing I noticed about my daughter is I never had to ask her twice to get ready for a practice or a game.
From a very young age , she loved the sport and would rather have done that than most any other thing.
She missed many parties and social events due to softball and I honestly do not ever remember her complaining about it.

Contrast that to my son who also started in sports at age 5, and by the time he was 12 he complained so much about having to go to practices that I finally asked him if he wanted to continue playing and his answer was NO.
He did not like sports at all and was happy to be done with it. He grew to be 6'4" and had a TON of talent and athletic ability.
Potential without the drive means nothing. He is a computer genius and that is where his passion was.
 
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