HS Softball Woes

Softball is supposed to be fun, if it is not fun why Play?

You have control over were DD plays outside of school ball, why have her be miserable in school Ball?

IMO, live up to her commitment and walk away when over.

My DD's HS team only has 1 win this season, had only 3 wins all year last year. My opinion is that it's because the coaches aren't hard enough on the players, so just about the exact opposite of your situation. Pitching is bad, usually more fielding errors than hits, DD says she feels like the other players just don't care about the game like she does, and it looks that way to me, too. That can suck the joy right out of the game, too, but slower than what you described. Her TB coaches aren't mean, but have communicated very clearly that they have high expectations and they work the girls hard. And they win more games against better competition. Makes me wish her HS coaches were the same way. The point I'm trying to make here is that different people have different reasons why HS ball sucks the life right out of them.

My DD was also a varsity catcher as a freshman last year. She was hesitant to say anything or step up and be a real leader because she was a freshman. This year is different. Two things made all the difference. The first is that she's a sophomore and has earned the respect of the players on the team and of the coaches. The coaches even ask her opinion on different aspects of practices and games from time to time. The other is that she has a different approach to the season this year because we agreed before the season started that it should be treated as a three-month-long practice to get ready for the TB summer season. It's up to her to maintain a high intensity level, and we get extra reps at home, even after a HS practice or game. She puts a lot of focus into her college recruiting process, too. That way, she can get her mind off of the lackluster mediocrity that a HS team often exemplifies.

So talk to your DD about using HS as a vehicle to get better for TB if she can stomach the negativity. Focusing on the ultimate goal could help. I'm sure you put in the extra reps at home, too, so keep doing that. Most importantly, it's your job to support your DD and shush at HS games. When you shush, it's easier to laugh at other ppl being stupid.


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Im a HS softball coach that personally feels that I do a pretty good job. One thing is a fact though, I have a great relationship with MOST kids and parents on the team, but there is one family (and kid) in every crowd.... I tolerate them and the snide comments that I often hear and others cannot wait to tell you about.... Most situations are a two way street. I will say, I rarely encounter bad kids. Bad parents on other hand.... Sheesh

Our school coaches are great. Not good, great.

With how many school programs are out there some parents and players will have a bad experience.

(Come to our HS, we are iffy at best but a lot of fun.)

Well, interesting how things work out.
I was saying how I wouldn't want DD 3 to quit a team in the middle of a season, but now she is threatening to quit her HS team. Says the coaches keep yelling at her all the time, accusing her of slacking when she is the hardest worker on the team, etc. I'm trying to at least get her to wait a few weeks before she quits.

Still not even to the first game yet, and I am already completely disillusioned with this softball program.
We are even discussing whether she should move down to JV2, which is a horrible team, but she has a great relationship with the coach.

DD ran into issues during high school ball, now a senior. She started every game since in high school ball. I just told her that sometimes life is rough and have to stick things out. The issues she encountered were playing the upperclassman just because they were older, some of the favorites getting recognized in paper and other stuff. Didn't have any issues with the other players to my knowledge.

She wanted to play, made the most of of every opportunity to work on her skill set, such as working on going from first to third on a bunt, timing up slower pitchers, getting bigger leads, etc. Her goal was to make improvements for the summer travel ball season and enjoy playing with her classmates.

My DD (now a senior) has had great coaches, okay coaches and bad coaches throughout her softball/baseball career. Rec, TB, and HS. It is what it is. Some that yelled, some that didn't yell enough, some that played Daddy/Mommy ball, some that tried really hard, some that didn't give a crap, some that overlooked her talent for political reasons. She has played with players that turned out to be friends, some that ended up enemies, We have always told her to do her best, try to learn something from every coach, focus on fundamentals and work really hard. We have always been a part of her work outside of practices - encouraging, pushing, critiquing. And we sought outside, private lessons and coaches for her development especially during the bad coaching times. Kind of sounds like my employment career. It has taught her drive, determination and how to have a thick skin. We have had to get involved a couple of times, having a respectful conversation with a coach here and there - especially when a weaker, older player was given playing time because they threatened the coach - but for the most part we have let her handle things herself.
She has never not wanted to play - but she has had to grit her teeth a lot (as had her dad and I). Be your DD's sounding board, don't let her be completely negative, encourage her to talk to the coach, and get involved if there is really no recourse.