I think you need to find out what your daughter wants and then plan with her how she will do it. We discusssed multiple options and thought proving her ability on the field would be best. It took 5 1/2 tournaments over 2 1/2 months for her to get the big games back. How long is your daughter willing to work? Other options are "new team" and talk to coach. New team may or may not keep you in the same position. Talking to coach is a good idea but ultimately she will have to change the coaches mind.
What to do?
- Thread starter Chuckaducky
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So what can you ask a coach that doesn't come across as complaining about playing time? And what age should the child ask on their own what they can do to improve instead of the parent asking? My DD landed on a great new team, but she's a little behind the rest of the girls so she didn't play alot this fall. My plan was to just ask the coach what he thinks about her skills in general because I'm concerned this team may be playing at too high of a level for her. Is that OK? Am I supposed to have her ask that? She's 12.
Your plan sounds good. Just ask for his assessment of her current playing level and how she fits in on the team going forward, what he'd like to see her do better come next spring. Express your concern about her development and the dilemma she's in: She could get more playing time on a weaker time, but then she wouldn't have the same level of teammates to push her. What does he think of that? As far as age, it's a good experience for them to have conversations with their coach, but it doesn't stunt their growth at age 12 if they don't. Nothing wrong w/ parents having those discussions w/ the coaches.
btw, how much playing time did she get in the fall?
Thanks for the advice. I would estimate that she played an average of 2 games in a 6 or 7 game tournament, and then was a sub or sometimes just in the line up. She is the weakest player on this team for sure so I'm not saying she deserved more playing time - I really just want to know if she's a good fit for this team. I don't think they need her.
The last tournament is what concerned me most because she only caught 2 innings out of 6 games. I assumed every coach rotated catchers, but that is apparently not the case! It's just different at this level where coaches are using their best 9 to win. Her last team just did an even rotation so everyone played regardless. But, of course the downside to that is really unmotivated players - which is why she moved to this team. Losing team = play a lot. Winning team = bench. I have no idea what to do with her.
I'm not a fan of 12U coaches who run teams like this. Not at all. They are not serving kids. They're not helping a player by playing her 2 games out of 7. Coaches have a responsibility to develop all of their players. If he doesn't feel like she's good enough to play more than that, then he shouldn't have taken her, IMO. And he should be concerned enough about her to talk w/ you about what's best for her, which might be another team.
