My DW and I just wanted to get some other opinions and advice on a situation that has recently arisen with our current TB coach. We do not want to be “those parents”, and have done very well so far not saying anything to any of the other parents or in earshot of our DD’s. We have only discussed with our DD’s private hitting and field coach over the last couple of weeks, but that is as far as we have gone with it.
Here is our current situation:
Last year a group in our community decided to put together a 12U TB team in order to help develop our girls as they were not getting much if any instruction in rec ball. We live in a rural community, so during our S15 season this meant a 70 mile drive to nearest league. I know a lot of the parents had an issue with the 140 mile round trip to watch our girls get “slaughtered” for 3 games each Saturday for 6 weeks, but we felt playing the better competition would be worth it in the long run. DW and I also were not surprised with the results of the games, just were glad that both our DD’s were getting game action against upper level pitching at this age. By the time our rec season started our girls were miles ahead of their competition (other area towns) and had the most successful rec season we have seen in close to 20 years. So we both felt that this TB experience was a huge success from that standpoint and decided it was well worth the time and money we had invested.
What I started to notice was the lack of fundamentals being taught to the girls by the coach, so last July DW and I decided that a PC would be our next investment. Since July both DD’s have been going to work with him on a weekly basis, and have been working on their own time at home. They did play a Fall 2015 limited TB schedule which amounted to playing the same 2 teams from a neighboring town every weekend for a month, not sure how much good was gained from this, but we went along with it, because it was live game action that can’t be replicated in practice. DD’s PC did watch a couple of their games as he was on the next field working HS players while the 12U’s were playing, but did not say much to us more than what each of our DD’s need to work more on and tailored their individual practices to focus on these issues.
That brings us to this spring! DW and I sat down with the TB coach in January and voiced what we would like to see from the upcoming season, which was seeing the girls play better competition whether that was though the same league they had played in the previous spring or by playing in some tournaments with better teams. We did not think that playing only friendlies was the avenue to pursue if it meant only being exposed to “watered” down completion repeatedly (and yes our team also falls into the watered down competition category). She agreed with us and said she would talk to some of the other parents and see what they thought. In February they had a TB meeting with the kids and parents, I was out of town, so DW attended with our DD’s and it was decided to form a league with the same friendlies we had played the previous Fall + one other team. I wasn’t overjoyed about this, especially when I saw that all three of the other teams in the league are also playing in the same league we played in last spring (roughly 70 miles each way for them too), but we will not be. DW and I decided that our DD’s had committed to this team for the Spring season so they would honor their commitments to this team for better or worse, and honestly neither DD has a problem with this team since it consists mostly of their friends.
All of that is not the current issue that we are having with the TB coach. Where we a starting to have real issues is with the following:
- Our DD’s have worked their tails off all offseason and have gotten noticeably better, especially DD1. TB coach also has a daughter on the team that was the “star” and has progressed much as anyone that didn’t pick up a bat or a softball for 6 months would. So now TB coach is finding anything to nit-pick on DD1 from her throwing motion to where she sets up in the batter’s box (DD1 getting very discouraged with this, brought up to her Private coach and to his credit just continues to drill her on the correct ways of doing it.) DD2 has been fine so far with TB coach, she has gotten better, but has not progressed as fast as DD1
- After one of their TB practices DW informed me that I needed to attend their next practice just to observe. I happened to be in town Monday, so I slipped down to the field and just watched from the bleachers. I was absolutely shocked at what I saw! TB coach basically worked with her DD and her DD’s two best friends (1B, C & SS) for the entire fielding practice. I thought maybe this was an exception to her normal practices, so I asked a mother that had arrived later in the practice and was sitting in the bleachers, and she informed me this is how every fielding practice is conducted. Then the strange got stranger in my as they headed over to the cage for batting practice. TB coach set up in the cage to do front toss to the girls, then had the girls going through two other stations outside of the cage, #1 hitting TCB balls front tossed by another player, #2 had one of the girls front toss to the girls while they batted “lefty” . This seemed odd since our entire team bats RH, and most are still struggling with RH batting.
- This same mother in the bleachers while we are watching fielding practice then proceeds to tell me this. Her DD wanted to start pitching so she asked TB coach what she needed to do about getting her DD started pitching, since TB coaches daughter is also a pitcher. TB coach told her to just find someone that maybe pitched in HS back in the day and get pointers from them. I thought this strange because I know TB coach has been sending her DD to pitching coaches for the last 3 years. Sitting in the bleachers I proceeded to give her names and phone numbers for three pitching coaches that I know of in the area, as we are still debating letting DD 1 pitch. Her answer to the other mother I thought was strange since she knows most if not all of the pitching coaches in the area. DW is now convinced that TB coach is trying to “sabotage” anyone that might work hard and get better than her DD. I’m not that sinister in my thinking that any coach would be doing this to 11 & 12 year olds.
Last night both DD’s had private lessons, so while DD’s were hitting in cage with private coach I asked him what the purpose of having the girls bat left handed for drills was (still thought I was just missing something and maybe this drill had some pertinence to their hitting development that I was unaware of). He almost fell down laughing when I told him about the girls having to bat “lefty”! Then he looked at me as serious as he ever has and said “It’s up to you, but after watching them play last Fall and from what you are telling me, you need to get your daughters away from that team and fast. You have spent a lot of money in private instruction for your daughters and believe me when I say this, your daughters have made outstanding progress, not because you bring them to lessons, but because they put the necessary time into practicing on their own doing drills the right way. Do not waste all of the progress they have made by playing for a “bad” coach and absolutely do not let that coach discourage them one bit from the excitement they have for this game!” PC then offered to call some TB coaches in the area that are sending players to him and see if any of them would have an opening for our DD’s on their teams either now or this fall.
We know we are in a really bad situation, we also know that for the next 6 weeks it’s not going to get any better, just hoping it does not get worse. We don’t think we wear rose colored glasses when it comes to our DD’s abilities, neither will be trying out for the USSSA select teams and neither will probably ever play past HS level, we just want to give them the tools necessary to compete and enjoy the game at that level when the time comes (and if one of them gets some fairy dust on them by accident and something magical happens then all the better!)
Just looking for some advice on what to do as I’m sure numerous members have been in situations similar to our current one. This situation is not about playing time as both DD's have already found out they will get game time based on the amount of effort they put into practice, DD2 learned this lesson the hard way from TB coach last season, and after sitting down with the coach around the kitchen table changed her practice effort and was rewarded with more game time. Sorry this turned into more of a “rant” about our situation, but just didn’t know how else to lay it out there.
Thanks form a very concerned set of parents.
Here is our current situation:
Last year a group in our community decided to put together a 12U TB team in order to help develop our girls as they were not getting much if any instruction in rec ball. We live in a rural community, so during our S15 season this meant a 70 mile drive to nearest league. I know a lot of the parents had an issue with the 140 mile round trip to watch our girls get “slaughtered” for 3 games each Saturday for 6 weeks, but we felt playing the better competition would be worth it in the long run. DW and I also were not surprised with the results of the games, just were glad that both our DD’s were getting game action against upper level pitching at this age. By the time our rec season started our girls were miles ahead of their competition (other area towns) and had the most successful rec season we have seen in close to 20 years. So we both felt that this TB experience was a huge success from that standpoint and decided it was well worth the time and money we had invested.
What I started to notice was the lack of fundamentals being taught to the girls by the coach, so last July DW and I decided that a PC would be our next investment. Since July both DD’s have been going to work with him on a weekly basis, and have been working on their own time at home. They did play a Fall 2015 limited TB schedule which amounted to playing the same 2 teams from a neighboring town every weekend for a month, not sure how much good was gained from this, but we went along with it, because it was live game action that can’t be replicated in practice. DD’s PC did watch a couple of their games as he was on the next field working HS players while the 12U’s were playing, but did not say much to us more than what each of our DD’s need to work more on and tailored their individual practices to focus on these issues.
That brings us to this spring! DW and I sat down with the TB coach in January and voiced what we would like to see from the upcoming season, which was seeing the girls play better competition whether that was though the same league they had played in the previous spring or by playing in some tournaments with better teams. We did not think that playing only friendlies was the avenue to pursue if it meant only being exposed to “watered” down completion repeatedly (and yes our team also falls into the watered down competition category). She agreed with us and said she would talk to some of the other parents and see what they thought. In February they had a TB meeting with the kids and parents, I was out of town, so DW attended with our DD’s and it was decided to form a league with the same friendlies we had played the previous Fall + one other team. I wasn’t overjoyed about this, especially when I saw that all three of the other teams in the league are also playing in the same league we played in last spring (roughly 70 miles each way for them too), but we will not be. DW and I decided that our DD’s had committed to this team for the Spring season so they would honor their commitments to this team for better or worse, and honestly neither DD has a problem with this team since it consists mostly of their friends.
All of that is not the current issue that we are having with the TB coach. Where we a starting to have real issues is with the following:
- Our DD’s have worked their tails off all offseason and have gotten noticeably better, especially DD1. TB coach also has a daughter on the team that was the “star” and has progressed much as anyone that didn’t pick up a bat or a softball for 6 months would. So now TB coach is finding anything to nit-pick on DD1 from her throwing motion to where she sets up in the batter’s box (DD1 getting very discouraged with this, brought up to her Private coach and to his credit just continues to drill her on the correct ways of doing it.) DD2 has been fine so far with TB coach, she has gotten better, but has not progressed as fast as DD1
- After one of their TB practices DW informed me that I needed to attend their next practice just to observe. I happened to be in town Monday, so I slipped down to the field and just watched from the bleachers. I was absolutely shocked at what I saw! TB coach basically worked with her DD and her DD’s two best friends (1B, C & SS) for the entire fielding practice. I thought maybe this was an exception to her normal practices, so I asked a mother that had arrived later in the practice and was sitting in the bleachers, and she informed me this is how every fielding practice is conducted. Then the strange got stranger in my as they headed over to the cage for batting practice. TB coach set up in the cage to do front toss to the girls, then had the girls going through two other stations outside of the cage, #1 hitting TCB balls front tossed by another player, #2 had one of the girls front toss to the girls while they batted “lefty” . This seemed odd since our entire team bats RH, and most are still struggling with RH batting.
- This same mother in the bleachers while we are watching fielding practice then proceeds to tell me this. Her DD wanted to start pitching so she asked TB coach what she needed to do about getting her DD started pitching, since TB coaches daughter is also a pitcher. TB coach told her to just find someone that maybe pitched in HS back in the day and get pointers from them. I thought this strange because I know TB coach has been sending her DD to pitching coaches for the last 3 years. Sitting in the bleachers I proceeded to give her names and phone numbers for three pitching coaches that I know of in the area, as we are still debating letting DD 1 pitch. Her answer to the other mother I thought was strange since she knows most if not all of the pitching coaches in the area. DW is now convinced that TB coach is trying to “sabotage” anyone that might work hard and get better than her DD. I’m not that sinister in my thinking that any coach would be doing this to 11 & 12 year olds.
Last night both DD’s had private lessons, so while DD’s were hitting in cage with private coach I asked him what the purpose of having the girls bat left handed for drills was (still thought I was just missing something and maybe this drill had some pertinence to their hitting development that I was unaware of). He almost fell down laughing when I told him about the girls having to bat “lefty”! Then he looked at me as serious as he ever has and said “It’s up to you, but after watching them play last Fall and from what you are telling me, you need to get your daughters away from that team and fast. You have spent a lot of money in private instruction for your daughters and believe me when I say this, your daughters have made outstanding progress, not because you bring them to lessons, but because they put the necessary time into practicing on their own doing drills the right way. Do not waste all of the progress they have made by playing for a “bad” coach and absolutely do not let that coach discourage them one bit from the excitement they have for this game!” PC then offered to call some TB coaches in the area that are sending players to him and see if any of them would have an opening for our DD’s on their teams either now or this fall.
We know we are in a really bad situation, we also know that for the next 6 weeks it’s not going to get any better, just hoping it does not get worse. We don’t think we wear rose colored glasses when it comes to our DD’s abilities, neither will be trying out for the USSSA select teams and neither will probably ever play past HS level, we just want to give them the tools necessary to compete and enjoy the game at that level when the time comes (and if one of them gets some fairy dust on them by accident and something magical happens then all the better!)
Just looking for some advice on what to do as I’m sure numerous members have been in situations similar to our current one. This situation is not about playing time as both DD's have already found out they will get game time based on the amount of effort they put into practice, DD2 learned this lesson the hard way from TB coach last season, and after sitting down with the coach around the kitchen table changed her practice effort and was rewarded with more game time. Sorry this turned into more of a “rant” about our situation, but just didn’t know how else to lay it out there.
Thanks form a very concerned set of parents.
