Decisions

Bchbum54 · Feb 25, 2016

DD is currently in what I call "softball limbo". We made the jump from rec to travel last Fall after Allstars. After an unfavorable experience with the team we left after the fall season with the understanding that January/February is a good time to move and tryout for a new team. After the Fall I felt like I had a good feel of the landscape and had a good idea of what teams I wanted DD to play for. After a bunch of tryouts we still don't have a team. Some teams that were intrested in DD were not the teams I thought they were (most had a lot of 02 play downs during the Fall). We declined some offers because we didn't feel the fit was right and DD was turned down from teams we would have really liked to be on. Afraid of not finding the right team we registered back in rec. I just felt it was best that she played something as opposed to nothing at all.

So right now DD is on a really solid rec team with lots of 03 players. We are still actively looking for the "right" TB team. So DD just finished a tryout with a team. Coach is really intrested in DD and asked us to come back and practice on Saturday and play a set of friendlies with them on Sunday. there are a lot of things I really like about this team. The coach is absolutely awsome.

The team on the other hand needs some work for sure. Definitely not the strongest team DD has played on. It is a true 04 team and I can only imagine under this coach that they will improve a lot. With this team DD has tons of opportunities to play where she wants.

A part of me (the competitive side) really wants DD to play for a competitive program, one that is going to challenge and push her to get better. it has been challenging finding a team like that who has a need for a player like DD. Most of those teams right now are set in the catchers and corner positions. Seems like they are mostly looking for Pitchers and middle infield/out fielders. I feel like I just need to get over the competitive thing and focus on the learning possibilities. I feel that if we are patient that this team has a lot of potential if they stay together under this coach come next spring and DD will have a significant contribution to the teams future success.

I'm dwelling overy this decision mostly because I don't want to investing so much money in a team and end up regretting it later or possibly settling on a team just because we currently don't have a team (rec doesn't count, lol).

After Sunday hopefully I will have a more concrete feeling and the decision one way or another won't be so difficult.

Sorry for the soap opera novel I just posted but I just needed to vent and let you guys know where DD is at right now, lol

grcsftbll · Feb 25, 2016

Our situation is different but we're in softball limbo too. Not fun.

Phathead · Feb 25, 2016

My opinion FWIW
1. Good fit is one so it can be enjoyed. No skill development, competition level, etc is worth a miserable summer of playing out of duty. It should be enjoyable.
2. Good fit will be they get enough play time to be enjoyable. If they are on the bench it's because there is better on the field or just her turn to sit. Either way she will be enjoying being there.

I know this seems overly simple but DD has sit a lot on teams and had a blast and played for teams that made her not want to go back. Ive seen more improvement on the prior.
4.

deboy922 · Feb 25, 2016

Sometimes "softball limbo" is part of the "journey". Don't sweat "overly dwelling" , as it is what we do, to try and find the best fit for our kids. Try not to "regret" any mistakes (easier said, than done). Keep making the best decisions you can, armed with the best information that you have at the time. The journey is a continual balancing-act of skill development, competition, having fun, money, and time. Good luck...it looks like you are doing great!

grcsftbll · Feb 25, 2016

I'm learning a lot about the balancing act right now. The team we left was incredibly talented. Great girls, very competitive, scrappers. We loved them but the coaching was not for us. We tried probably longer than we should to make it work. You'll find the right place I'm sure. I am going to believe that because I want to believe the same is true for us

chinamigarden · Feb 25, 2016

Bchbum54 said:
DD is currently in what I call "softball limbo". We made the jump from rec to travel last Fall after Allstars. After an unfavorable experience with the team we left after the fall season with the understanding that January/February is a good time to move and tryout for a new team. After the Fall I felt like I had a good feel of the landscape and had a good idea of what teams I wanted DD to play for. After a bunch of tryouts we still don't have a team. Some teams that were intrested in DD were not the teams I thought they were (most had a lot of 02 play downs during the Fall). We declined some offers because we didn't feel the fit was right and DD was turned down from teams we would have really liked to be on. Afraid of not finding the right team we registered back in rec. I just felt it was best that she played something as opposed to nothing at all.

So right now DD is on a really solid rec team with lots of 03 players. We are still actively looking for the "right" TB team. So DD just finished a tryout with a team. Coach is really intrested in DD and asked us to come back and practice on Saturday and play a set of friendlies with them on Sunday. there are a lot of things I really like about this team. The coach is absolutely awsome.

The team on the other hand needs some work for sure. Definitely not the strongest team DD has played on. It is a true 04 team and I can only imagine under this coach that they will improve a lot. With this team DD has tons of opportunities to play where she wants.

A part of me (the competitive side) really wants DD to play for a competitive program, one that is going to challenge and push her to get better. it has been challenging finding a team like that who has a need for a player like DD. Most of those teams right now are set in the catchers and corner positions. Seems like they are mostly looking for Pitchers and middle infield/out fielders. I feel like I just need to get over the competitive thing and focus on the learning possibilities. I feel that if we are patient that this team has a lot of potential if they stay together under this coach come next spring and DD will have a significant contribution to the teams future success.

I'm dwelling overy this decision mostly because I don't want to investing so much money in a team and end up regretting it later or possibly settling on a team just because we currently don't have a team (rec doesn't count, lol).

After Sunday hopefully I will have a more concrete feeling and the decision one way or another won't be so difficult.

Sorry for the soap opera novel I just posted but I just needed to vent and let you guys know where DD is at right now, lol

A lot of "I"s in that post. What does your dd want.

wave_twister · Feb 25, 2016

grcsftbll said:
I'm learning a lot about the balancing act right now. The team we left was incredibly talented. Great girls, very competitive, scrappers. We loved them but the coaching was not for us. We tried probably longer than we should to make it work. You'll find the right place I'm sure. I am going to believe that because I want to believe the same is true for us

You sound just like my story, January we just left such a team.

Don't jump around for the sake of "competition". I wish I could rewind 3 years ago, I'd give a kidney to do so and redo my softball life for DD. She's got great skill after going through travel/A bracket play after coming up from the crude, unrefined "rec ball" goons...nah, just kidding!...but I don't know why sometimes people look down on rec ball. You mention they're a solid team so I'd stay honestly if DD was getting to shine a lot.

Our old travel team was like a Cartel. If you're not "in", you're just not "in". I have a feeling it was all coaching decisions, not parents or players. I miss them all, but the mistake I made initially was "Wow, look at those girls. Those coaches really run a tight squad, blah blah blah."

The hard thing was the lip service was there too so it looked good, sounded good, hell the dirt probably smelled and tasted good. I wish I didn't make the decision, it sounds weird, but I wish I let my 8 year old DD 3 years ago make the final decision. I have a feeling she would've chose to stay in rec ball, she was still very good for her age too. She played games 8u on Saturdays and 10u on Sundays...yes, I now know that wasn't ASA/OJO legal supposedly but I was flying intoxicated by the increased need for higher competition, reps, progress. I never asked questions and just took DD for the whirl wind of all of our lives...now we need rehab.

let it be fun · Feb 25, 2016

If it seems like she has fun with these 04 girls, likes the coach, and will get to play a lot you should go for it. If this 04 team turns out to be great fit and your DD has a great summer with them that will be a great experience for you both. Maybe you posted it somewhere and I didn't see it, but if your DD is an 03 and not an 04 she might have to part ways with these girls after a season anyway depending on what age level they want to play at. Don't get too worried about one summer.

BobInMadison · Feb 25, 2016

I am very glad I let DD 3 make the choice for what team to play on.

I pushed DD 1 a little, and that was probably a mistake. I let DD 3 be at the center of the process. When DD 3 wanted to change teams, she told me which team she wanted to join, and why she wanted to switch. At first I resisted, but now I think it was the correct decision.

DD 1 was a lot happier when I finally let her be at the center of the process. She quit playing for a while, then came back for a season of HS ball, then hung up her cleats for good. If I had pushed her to come back for HS ball, she probably would've rebelled and gone out for track instead. Instead I relayed a message from a former rec ball coach whom she really admired, inviting her to try out HS ball. In fact, that rec ball coach helped out with practices, and helped DD 1 improve her hitting.

JJsqueeze · Feb 25, 2016

Beachbum- I know we corresponded back when you were choosing teams but I forget which team you ended up choosing...PM me please, I would love to know the inside skinny, I am like a bored housewife when it comes to local softball gossip, I just can't pass up some dirt.

Join the club on picking a bad fit out of the gate, you live and learn. As she develops and as you get more experience you will make far better decisions, I know I have. The biggest benefit a parent gets from experience is knowing where their player truly fits in the grand scheme of things, and you really only understand that after being on a couple of teams. You also learn your own priorities, and they change as they get older. I know there is a big "something to prove" aspect of the first few years of travel ball, you want to know where your DD stacks up, can she hang, etc. And playing on a really competitive team is one route to finding this out, but playing AGAINST top teams in another. My girls are on good but not great teams. Good enough to beat up on about half the teams they play, compete with another 30% but they get consistently beat by the top 20% teams. I am perfectly OK with that, I still get to see how they do against those teams so I can evaluate where they stand. So if you find yourself on a team where everything is enjoyable but they are not a "top team" do not sweat it, you will still see enough top teams out there on the dirt to know where your kid stands and what to work on.

By any chance are you at Carl Thorton park this Sunday? The way you describe the team makes me think I might know who they are and we might play you.

Decisions

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Bchbum54

grcsftbll

Phathead

deboy922

grcsftbll

chinamigarden

wave_twister

let it be fun

BobInMadison

JJsqueeze

Dad, Husband....legend

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