Coach upset with DD for going to Homecoming

players

DD said if they only have 8, she will play but won't be happy about it. I think they will have 9. I think it is different for girls. ..2 of her teammates said they wouldn't miss their homecoming.
I'm a little surprised she isn't going because she's been having a blast and doing well.

Easton33 said:

Softball aside, IMO it is important to teach a child what commitment truly means. Some day those children will be adults and they will have to make some serious commitments that have severe consequences if those commitments aren't met. When it is ok to break one commitment, how do you pick and choose what commitment it is ok to break from then on? Seriously folks, I bet everyone that has a child on a team also has a teammate of your child that has sacrificed something fun or something they thought was important. To support her decision of breaking a commitment is equally wrong IMO.
I understand you told him in advance but you also left the task of running and managing a team to him. He can't bend for every player request. Think about it, if everyone took off for Homecoming you would possibly go 4 - 6 weeks without playing.

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I don't know about your situation, but my DD gives up A LOT for softball. She has 2 practices a week with her team in the off season, which she shows up early to in order to catch for some pitchers. She also has two pitching clinics and one catching clinic per week on top of the practices. Spring time she gives up numerous weekends for tournaments. Summer is spent traveling and away from friends and family. She gives up a lot of time to this sport. If she wants to go to homecoming in the fall, I'm going to let her. I really don't think it will affect her understanding of what a commitment is.

commitment

That's basically what DD said. We were traveling four nights a week for practice in the summer an hour each way and then doing the tournaments. There's a few weeks off in December but it's a big commitment.

What does commitment truly mean? Have you ever typed a post on this site or searched the internet for something not work related? Broken commitment. Have you ever done something your significant other didn't want you even if they didn't say no but you knew they weren't happy about it? Broken commitment. Ever taken a vacation day after a tournament because you were just too tired to go to work? Broken commitment and you made other people have to make up for your lack of productivity just as in this case. Justify it any way you want, commitments are broken daily. This coach has a commitment to these girls to not let them play injured...(what would've happened if she broke her ankle when it was weak and playing, coach would've been screwed....) and to let the KIDS be kids.

The girl is committed to the team and the coach needs to be committed to them. If a player misses for something they deem important, so what. Coaching is just like anything else, you have to keep your people happy. Sometimes it takes a little sacrificing on your end too. When commitment starts to wean, then you have a problem.

Most teams that play in the Fall and go to these showcases carry at least 15-20 girls on the team.
Our coach has no problem with the girls missing for HC and Prom at some point in their HS years.
My daughter is very committed to her sport and pitches and practices when her friends are out at the movies and just hanging out.
So for her to say this is one event she is not missing...I feel like she deserves to be a girl and enjoy high school.

I am excited to see her with a dress and makeup on AND....hair not in a pony tail!!!

Brusied up knees and all

She's not breaking a commitment, IMO. Her commitment as of two months ago was that she would play in every tournament for which she was healthy except this one. She's sticking with it.

Those who really want to play will play in my opinion. I had a girl come to practice at 6pm on a weeknight when it gets dark at 6:20..she was late due to a dentist appt..She said 20 swings with the bat is better than none. Another girl missed a Sunday practice at 9am because she was going someplace later on. It is what it is

DD asked about homecoming and I told her she deserved it because of all the hours she spent at practice and tournaments the last nine months. I assured her I would talk to the coach about it. Homecoming was during a college exposure tournament and fortunately we had early games and were done by 3PM Saturday. We lefted our house the next morning at 5:15 to be at warmups the next morning. Kid never missed a beat. Best weekend she had in a long time.

I agree with Coogansbluff. Coach knew plenty in advance and should have made arrangements then.

I agree with everyone else...the coach needs to grow up.

Tell her to have a great time!!!

I would be more concerned about the coaches attitude. She made here decision 2 months ago and he needs to accept it. My DD is only 12 now and has already missed a lot of things because of softball so if she came to me and said I would rather do XYZ instead of play in a tournament 2 months from now I would respect her decision and let her.