Family Vacations

For some of us we are blessed that our softball and immediate families are one and the same....

mad hornet said:

For some of us we are blessed that our softball and immediate families are one and the same....

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we were the same.... weekend tournies WERE our vacations... we called them MINI-VACATIONS and quite honestly, we were VERY fortunate that the players AND parents all got along so well, we were friends for years and most STILL stay in touch. We spent time at other games also, ( HS and Big League) and many times at dinner or house functions.... it was a GREAT! I'll always relish those times.
(( for those that MAY snicker about Big Leagues..... Waldorf (Southern Maryland, where I lived for 16 of previous 19 years before moving 2 years ago to Southern VA), anyway, Waldorf won the Big League World Series 5 of 7 years in Michigan! Look it up! outstanding devoted/committed and VERY NICE kids and great coaches I was lucky enough to learn from).

We had a lot of fun and would HIGHLY recommend the same, BUT I can understand families that prefer to do the family thing, so I don't get aggrevated at all, its just an opportunity for other players to get more playing time then usual.

I think upfront communication is key. If a coach expects the player to forego vacation during the season, tell them before the parents fork over the deposit. Give them a chance to decide if your team is or isn't right for you.

I don't think a lot of coaches realize how important it is to have a team / parent meeting before ever taking the practice field. You have to set expectations and explain your rationale or you're going to have misunderstandings and hurt feelings later. If the parents get up and leave, (hasn't happened yet) it's probably for the best.

mad hornet said:

I think upfront communication is key. If a coach expects the player to forego vacation during the season, tell them before the parents fork over the deposit. Give them a chance to decide if your team is or isn't right for you.

I don't think a lot of coaches realize how important it is to have a team / parent meeting before ever taking the practice field. You have to set expectations and explain your rationale or you're going to have misunderstandings and hurt feelings later. If the parents get up and leave, (hasn't happened yet) it's probably for the best.

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Absolutely. I am HUGE on being UPFRONT about EVERYTHING at the PRE-SEASON Team/parents meeting.

Our family "vacation" was spent this past summer in Normal, Illinois.

Here's the thing. My husband and myself could spend all day, most days watching softball, baseball, basketball, soccer....because we see the passion in our children. Things are sports crazy in our family and I have to admit, we love it. Our record is 3 kids, mult. sports, 18 games in one weekend (the record NOT the norm). It takes both parents and occasionally grandparents to make it work. Tournaments a mini family vacation? No way. I seriously doubt our dd's younger brothers would consider her tournaments vacation. Also, they have tournaments of their own - Dad happens to coach both boys in baseball as well as oversee dd's pitching training. Did I mention Dad is in treatment for a life threatening disease for the last year, and will continue indefinitely? Nothing like that to put things in perspective. FAMILY means EVERYONE in the family, not just dd. There has to be balance. Too often, one child's sport or passion can dominate a family. While we LOVE our kids tournaments and training with Dad IS excellent quality time, this does not take the place of Family Time. We do take time out for just family. We already have our tourn. schedule for 2010. Of course, there are weekends off...we take every advantage of those and plan our family time

Weekends off? REST!

IMO, often younger siblingoften do kind of think of it as vacation. They get to travel, stay in hotels, swim in hotel pools, eat at restraunts, concession stands, and play with other kids on the playgrounds at ballparks, and hang out with the siblings of other players. If theres some kind of local attraction that can be thrown in too, so much the better. Beats being at home bored or in daycare or something a lot of the time.

You are right. Put in perspective, they are only a certain age once and in a few short years they will be grown and gone.

A good question to always ask is if something happened to someone tomorrow, what would you regret not having done when you had the chance? Sometimes, that tomorrow you keep putting things off until , just never comes.

That is the reason my own life is pretty much 100% about the kids, and not about me. I cant remember the last time I did something I wanted to do without them, not since they were just too young to be involved. I know a few parents that do very little with their kids, and will go off fishing or hunting or golfing etc every weekend with their buddies, but without the kids. I think that is quite selfish and sad.

I don't think hanging at the softball fields, instead of PLAYING on the baseball field will ever seem like a vacation to our boys and vice versa for their sister. Even though Mom & Dad love it, a 7 & 10 yr. old do not want to sit through 7 softball games in a weekend. Concessions? I'm the mom who packs the car with coolers and all kinds of nutrient rich foods....you know the one who ends up feeding the girls who blew their lunch money on junk.

All our children have their own sports and activities, they don't sit at home...they go outside and PLAY and they are fortunate enough to not go to daycare. Their Dad is the one the neighbor kids ask to come out and play football and kickball because....he will.

A hotel, concessions and multiple games are not always like a vacation for siblings. Long weekends at the lake boating, tubing, swimming ALL TOGETHER - that's a mini vacation. While as parents we could go to endless tournaments for siblings it's not so great. So, again it's about balance....fostering ALL our kids' passions and making sure we do have time for family. So far, we've been lucky .

I agree, that family time is precious and spending time with each of our kids is our focus. As for our dd, if she takes nothing else from softball, she will always have (and I think treasure) the multitude of hours her Dad spent catching her.

We left a tournament once after we got into the loosing bracket and kept winning. My daughter, at the time, was 12. We had no chance of winning in the tournament and I had rented an RV and planned a family trip and taken time off of work. She played outfield and was in a batting slump at the time so I choose vacation over staying and playing endless games. Suffice to say the team did poorly.

We caught all kinds of hell from the parents when we returned even though we had never missed one game/practice. They actually shunned us for a while accusing me of being not committed. My daughter's presence would not have made any difference in the outcome.

Overall it was a horrible experience and I recommend you not take a vacation during your daughter's travel ball season. (Some)Travel ball parents are crazy and soured my families taste for softball.

Alan
(former operator of the fastpitch forum).

So you committed to play in a tournament and then decided to leave the team in the middle of the tournament because your kid was playing poorly and there was no hardware to be won. And the other parents are "crazy" because they were displeased with your commitment to the team.

I could respect your decision (and I am guessing the crazy parents could as well) if you made it in advance and independent of team and your DD's performance. That would have left the team able to pick up a player (if they felt it was necessary) and no expectation that you would be there.