I think I suck as a parent....

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Dec 23, 2009
791
0
San Diego
But we talked about not burning bridges, staying humble and being respectful on the way home. I need the talks more than her most days.

Probably just semantics to most but DW and I have taught DD that respect must be earned but that everyone is entitled (up to a point) to courtesy. And respect is not earned simply because you're older or have a shirt on that says COACH.
 
May 24, 2013
12,461
113
So Cal
I have no idea either Doug. He told them to go and warm up....she did and he'd stop every time because she was doing something different than the other pitcher. Which was fine I guess. But, the fact that he wouldn't stop or, as Josh said, ask why do you do that drill, etc was the annoying thing.

One of the reasons I really respect and appreciate the HC of my DD's 10U team is that he doesn't try to impose his way - or the way his DD is being taught - on everyone else, if he knows they are working with a private instructor. His own DD is a very good pitcher, and has been taught an HE/push type delivery. Our other pitcher works with an instructor who teaches more of an I/R delivery. When it's time for them to warm up, they each go through a different routine. HC knows that what matters is what happens when the ball crosses the plate, not the motion that got it there. Both of these young ladies have the ability to be completely dominant, and often are. We consider them to be our "#1 pitcher, and our other #1 pitcher".
 
Jun 11, 2013
2,623
113
Our coaches always told us to mention to them if they are teaching something different than you are being taught and they would let you do it your way. The mistake I made once was not realizing that one of the new AC's that came on didn't get the memo on this and messed with DD's swing. Since she wasn't taking lessons with a "coach", he felt it fair game and put in some changes that took 3 months of hard work to correct. I was gone for 2 of the practices and could not believe what he was teaching.

If you believe in your method or your coaches method, in a nice way tell them to back off making changes. Keep in mind that if 2 players are struggling though, the one following their advice will most likely get the benefit of the doubt.
 
Jul 16, 2008
1,520
48
Oregon
Personally, I don't know why so many people feel the need to step forward and impose their view of what pitching mechanics should be on just any old Sally or Jane pitcher they run into. Who asked them in the first place. My favorite is for the pitcher to simply, but matter of factly say, "Thanks, but I have a pitching coach and I have warm-up drills that are specific to the pitching mechanics I'm being taught."

Yes... and not even mentioning this is a 12U coach, who probably was just watching behind the fence last year, and now is a team pitching coach this year. Next year he will start charging for lessons :)
 

JAD

Feb 20, 2012
8,231
38
Georgia
He told her that if she did what he said in warm ups that she'd be more consistent. He rode her for a few minutes. Her reply "I struck out your batters every time we scrimmage." Crap hit the fan then! He went to my DD's head coach and told HC that she's not listening and stuff like that. For the rest of the session, they just worked with the other pitcher.

I am always amazed at the number of coaches who think they are qualified pitching and hitting instructors.....as a parent I would ask the assistant coach what his/her qualifications are for changing your DD's routine!
 
Jun 27, 2011
5,089
0
North Carolina
DD does her warm up that her coach told her to do. The 12u coach didn't want her to do that. They wanted her doing straight arm wrist snaps, etc. like the other pitcher. DD told them "I don't do that because it creates bad habits and there's no point in doing something that I won't do in a game.) Well, he didn't like that. He told her that if she did what he said in warm ups that she'd be more consistent. He rode her for a few minutes. Her reply "I struck out your batters every time we scrimmage." Crap hit the fan then! He went to my DD's head coach and told HC that she's not listening and stuff like that. For the rest of the session, they just worked with the other pitcher. .

How many coaches among us have not instructed players to do something in practice that, in retrospect, was a waste of time? How many of us wouldn't grimace at least one or two things if we watched a practice we ran five years ago?

So let's imagine that you as a coach, in good faith, have a practice plan, and you ask a player to do something, let's say static stretching (which I no longer advocate), to name one, and a player says, ''I don't do that.'' And then you ask the player to trust you, and she says in essence that she's better than everybody else and therefore she'd rather do it her way than theirs.

Not surprising the coach didn't like that, and that he didn't continue to work with that player. There's nothing in this example, based on the info given, to make me think less of the coach.

As for the player, I liked cbullard's defense. Not judging her. Just think that we've got to be accepting that coaches are going to be ignorant about things. They're just travel ball volunteers. Then if they are respectfully challenged and don't want to learn, we can assess from there.
 
Dec 5, 2012
4,143
63
Mid West
The earth is still flat for a lot of HE PC's... They believe what they believe and refuse to hear an alternative, especially one that is said to be superior to theirs.
My dd was made to do push up for failing to use HE mechanics by her HS coach. This was after repeated conversations with him by her at first that fell of deaf ears. Once I got involved she didn't pitch for that team again. There's an old saying... "if your going to do it, then do it right!" At one time, 100+ years ago in order to plow a field, you did it manually with a horse or two....and that was the right way at the time because the tractor hadn't been invented yet. These PC's will walk past the John Deere to grab a hand plow because they never took the time to learn how to drive it... idiots
 
Jul 10, 2014
1,283
0
C-bus Ohio
...And for the record, I am a firm believer that if a girl is doing her job and being effective from the circle, she could pitch standing on her head and her coach wouldn't care.

As a 12U HC, I 98% agree. The 2% I have an issue with is when the wheels come off. If I don't know what she's doing I can't help, all I can do is pull her and say, "Good game."

I'm mostly OK with that.

I tell my pitchers to get warmed up and then go check on infield/outfield or whatever for 10 minutes. By this age they should be able to get through their warmups without my intervention.
 
May 12, 2014
833
28
Update: Spoke with DD last night and let her know that I saw what happened. Offered some of the advice given from you wonderful people and she understood. She said she felt really bad after the "argument" happened and that she wants to apologize when she sees him whenever the two teams get together again. Good for her......

I did ask why she reacted the way she did. She said "It's because he put me down in front off all of the other pitchers. I tried to politely tell him that my PC doesn't have me do straight arm wrist snaps because we don't pitch like that in a game. And he kept saying you need to or that's why you are inconsistent early....but in a really rude way. Even Emily (other pitcher) was looking at him like what's going on. So, I defended myself by letting him know I struck out his well coached batters. He was arrogant, Dad. But, I won't do that again."

I'm glad she was able to vent. She's a very well mannered kid....but, she's a human being and we have emotions. I told her you're 11....mistakes are great at your age because you can learn from them and move on quickly.....not like when you are my age and I dwell on why I bought cheerios instead of frosted flakes! :eek:
 
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