Thread: How far should you take it?

Well the HS softball season is winding down and it has been more difficult than I could have imagined. I have probably even commented on this site to others to bite the bullet but now that I have experienced it I just want to apologize to anyone I made a recommendation to regarding HS coaching.

Here is my question. I have coached travel ball for several years in the area and many of the girls in the area have played for one of our teams. The parents have been approaching me and asking me to go with them to meet with the athletic director of our school to voice the concerns of the coaching of the team.

What should I do?

If your HS coach is in over his/her head, then the best thing they can do is add a couple of assistant coaches who know what they are doing! Volunteer to be an assistant coach!

You have to think outside the box. I've gotten a lot done for the team just by bending his ear, making him believe it was HIS idea and stroking his ego. Like candy from a baby.

Our HS never traveled to play tournaments, I put that on his plate DD's freshman year. And buddy it has really helped develope this team. Because unlike TB mostly only good HS teams take the time and money to invest in such. It really took our team to the next level, this is our 3rd year and we have won 2 of 3 big tourneys. 50 teams, 32 teams and 15 teams in each from 11 states.

You also can make mention of who needs to play where, but wait until the time is right and again make it look like he was incharge of that decision.

Originally Posted by rowdy

Well the HS softball season is winding down and it has been more difficult than I could have imagined. I have probably even commented on this site to others to bite the bullet but now that I have experienced it I just want to apologize to anyone I made a recommendation to regarding HS coaching.

Here is my question. I have coached travel ball for several years in the area and many of the girls in the area have played for one of our teams. The parents have been approaching me and asking me to go with them to meet with the athletic director of our school to voice the concerns of the coaching of the team.

What should I do?

Tell everyone of those parents that it would be better if each went to the AD with this issue. Why should you be the one hung out to dry. If they refuse, then its not a fight worth fighting for them.

Tell them "No thanks." If all of you are really that unhappy, just don't have anyone go out for the team. If they are down to 8 players, for example, someone will notice.

What should I do?

Reach into your sock drawer and retrieve a pair of them. Place them firmly between your teeth and hold them there. Then sit on your hands so when the urge to reach up and remove them strikes you'll be unable to do so.

After urge to "Do something." has passed give the leader of the brain-trust a pat on the back as you steer them to the AD's office with the advice of "Let me know what happens." and "I got yer back." whispered in their ear.

Just because you know the right way the game needs to be played does not necessarily make you the best spokesperson. Chances are the AD knows less about the game than the coach does and because of the lack of knowledge he'll side with the union teacher and softball coach.

Originally Posted by Screwball

Going Deep: Your approach is condescending and selfish and controlling. You have no business telling the coach who needs to play where, as if that is rocket science that only you know and that you must have these HS wins (what for yourself?). That the coach allows it is a true testament to what an idiot he is. So I guess you deserve each other.

Whether the coach is good enough or certainly not the travel coach's business either, he probably does not have the same political pressures of the coach, limited time with the kids, etc.

Ganging up by getting the travel coach to do it on hearsay, true or not, is really obnoxious. The coach gets paid about minimum wage, you know.

A parent only wants to look after his or her own daughter, while the coach is pulled in a million directions.

Everyone and their brother wants to assist the HS coach because they know better. So that stinks too.

Truly the parents can handle this, but in a dignified way. Most of the time, just leave it alone and let it be unless there is bullying or some serious issues going on. Do you pay this much attention to a bad teacher? Probably not.

To answer your question, I take more notice of a bad teacher than I do a bad coach and yes if I think a teacher is bad I will not let my kids stay in that environment. My daughter happens to be one of the best players on the team, and the coach treats her fine, so that is not the issue.

I don't usually agree with your point of view but in this instance I will give a couple of examples. I have been to 15-20 practices this spring and I have yet to see the team do more than one thing in an hour and half practice. Usually a player will sit on a bucket and toss balls to the girls one at a time while the others field (watch). After the hour and a half the go home. They practice every day for at least an hour and a half so they spend way more time with the kids than a travel coach. The starting pitcher has given up 10 or more runs in 9 games and usually has 6-8 walks in a seven inning game. The second pitcher has only thrown one game all year and she had a shutout but lost in extra innings. That was her one and only start. Now tell me more.

If you really want to go to the AD, good luck. Keep in mind that it could backfire and cause a lot of greif for your DD in the end.

You may want to take a different approach. Don't go to practices or games if you are getting annoyed. Let your DD have some fun representing her school. If you think the unproductive practices are effecting your DD, work with her outside of practice to keep her skills up.

My DD's HS coach sounds a lot like yours. Short practices, no drills, 1 kid doing something at a time, kids sitting around, blah blah blah. He has "coached" the team for 12 years and the AD loves him because he wins (only because he is lucky enough to have over half of the team on TB teams in summer). People throughout the years have tried, unsuccessfully, to talk to AD about replacing him with the JV coach who coaches a TB team in summer, goes to coaching clinics and has very good practices for the JV team.

My advice to you is take your own advice from earlier this year.

Rowdy, I would venture a guess and say that if you really thought doing this was a good idea you would not have posted a question. You would have just gone to speak with the AD and maybe posted about it afterwards. You seem on the fence and that is not a good place to be in these situations.

As Screwball alluded too, schools are like foreign countries in many ways with each having their own language and traditions and civil wars that an outsider, even the parents and students, may not be aware of.

In the event you do decide to go I would make sure you have a game plan in place between yourself and the parents. One of the most frustrating parts of coaching for me is parents who always have time to stop me to complain about something but never have time to actually help. In the unlikely event the AD offers to let you and the parents take over the team are you prepared for that. If he says they don't have enough assistants to do much else during practice are you and the parents prepared to step up.

You should also decide how far to push this. What if the AD says he will look into this and nothing happens. Will the parents then expect you to go to the school board. Would you push to try and get this coach removed.

There are too many variables in this to really give anything other than general, most like not helpful, advice on what to do or what I might do in the situation. Just let us know what you ultimately decide and how it worked out,