Another tryout question

IF your DD receives calls from more than one team offering her a position, how do you turn down the other team(s)? I assume most coaches know that kids are going to more than one tryout. Trying to find the best fit for my DD and family. Many things go into the decision, like quality of team, kids already on the team, and how DD gets along with the ones already there, Team fees, amount of travel, etc. It is a big decision, and a HUGE time commitment for softball, and not an easy decision. I am sure everyone on here already knows that. One team that we were going to try out for, I heard from other families that their up front fee was a cool even grand. Crossed that one off the list. We just don't have the money for something like that.

So, how is it that you turn down a team? Call them back? Is a text acceptable? Do you owe them any kind of explanation at all, or just say that you chose another team?

Il softball fan said:

IF your DD receives calls from more than one team offering her a position, how do you turn down the other team(s)? I assume most coaches know that kids are going to more than one tryout. Trying to find the best fit for my DD and family. Many things go into the decision, like quality of team, kids already on the team, and how DD gets along with the ones already there, Team fees, amount of travel, etc. It is a big decision, and a HUGE time commitment for softball, and not an easy decision. I am sure everyone on here already knows that. One team that we were going to try out for, I heard from other families that their up front fee was a cool even grand. Crossed that one off the list. We just don't have the money for something like that.

So, how is it that you turn down a team? Call them back? Is a text acceptable? Do you owe them any kind of explanation at all, or just say that you chose another team?

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Simply tell them "Suzy has decided to play for Team X. Thank you for your interest in her."

I think that you should do it by the method they offered you a position. You don't need to offer then an explanation.

Be pleasant to them but do it soon so they can move on. You never know when you'll meet up again down the road.

We once left a team (during offseason) in a way that I wished we hadn't. I am still friends with the other coach, but I wish
I had done it different.

Il softball fan said:

One team that we were going to try out for, I heard from other families that their up front fee was a cool even grand. Crossed that one off the list.

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I would not recommend relying on the word of other families when it comes to what a team charges, does not charge. If you have an interest and the team has an interest, you can find out what the annual/season dues are if/when your DD is selected. I know it might be hard to believe but some will put out false information in order to better their DD's chances of being selected. Things change with teams financially all the time and it would really suck to cross a very good team off the list because their dues for the previous season were to high, only to find out later that due to sponsorship opportunities, that team is charging a quarter of what they did.

As for turning a team down, at a minimum it should be through a phone call. I expect a call if my DD is not selected, so I try to provide the same courtesy.

This advice applies to both TB and College Coaches - Do NOT provide an explanation, even if asked for one directly! Doing so opens up a dialog that you do not want to occur.

Thanks everyone for the advise. The Maj, that was not the only thing that was the deciding factor, but the "final nail" so to speak. The mother that told me the fee last year was 1000 was on the team, and her DD was not going back, so I don't believe that she would have reason to lie to me about it.

I would encourage anyone looking to join a TB or College team to make sure both DD and you have an opportunity to talk to the players. We typically get our players together, introduce them to the parents of the prospective player and then my AC and I leave. No question is off limits and the players are told to be honest. My DD and DW got the same treatment when my DD did her official visit at SC. Aside from the actual offer it was the highlight of the trip.

Il softball fan said:

IF your DD receives calls from more than one team offering her a position, how do you turn down the other team(s)? I assume most coaches know that kids are going to more than one tryout. Trying to find the best fit for my DD and family. Many things go into the decision, like quality of team, kids already on the team, and how DD gets along with the ones already there, Team fees, amount of travel, etc. It is a big decision, and a HUGE time commitment for softball, and not an easy decision.

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As a coach, I make sure that every player that tries out receives a phone call. Typically I do not leave messages. I will call again later in order to speak with one of the parents directly. If the player chooses another team, I would appreciate a call back. No explanation is needed. I just appreciate quick answers so that I can start calling others.

It is a very big decision and a number of factors are involved. Just realize that there is a certain amount of risk no matter what. A pitcher in our area went to several tryouts last year, only to choose a certain team because the parents wanted her to work with the catcher on that team. After making the commitment and paying the registration fee, uniform fee, etc., they learned that the catcher decided to leave for another team. What all parents need to realize is that you are not alone. You may make a decision for a specific reason only to find out later that the circumstances have changed.

riseball said:

This advice applies to both TB and College Coaches - Do NOT provide an explanation, even if asked for one directly! Doing so opens up a dialog that you do not want to occur.

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Agreed, and this advice applies to player-parents as well.

To the OP, if you receive the offer before leaving the field that day, then you respond by phone call. If you receive the offer by phone, then you respond by phone. If you receive the offer via text, then you respond via text.

I don't get into long conversations: "Thanks so much for the offer. She appreciates the tryout, but will be playing with Little Suzie's Bombers this fall. Best of luck to you and the team next season. We'll see you at the fields."

Il softball fan said:

Thanks everyone for the advise. The Maj, that was not the only thing that was the deciding factor, but the "final nail" so to speak. The mother that told me the fee last year was 1000 was on the team, and her DD was not going back, so I don't believe that she would have reason to lie to me about it.

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I understand and I was hoping that it was not the only factor and yes, there are some people that I trust. In my old age, I have become a bit cynical though and I have seen some parents attempt to persuade another that a team is not good or something is wrong in order to prevent someone from showing up at tryouts. I have seen it more than once unfortunately.