This is the "right" way? Who decides?

Who gets to decide if one way or the other is the "RIGHT" way?

Every one of us has invoked the words, "This is the 'right' way to do it!" at one point or another, probably many different times. More and more this is bothering me. There are lots of ways to do thing, but who ultimately gets to decide what the "right" way is?

As travel-ball coaches, we'd all like to think what we teach is the "right" way, yet other, very good coaches, often argue another way is the "right" way.
We parents of players know of instances when what we've taught is, in our minds, the "right" way, only to have a travel-ball or high school coach argue that another way is the "right" way and what we teach is "wrong."

Quite frankly, I think the work "right" is invoked far too often, kind of like our children whining that something isn't "fair." Whatever does the word "fair" mean.

My question is this.... Do you agree that the words "the right way" are over-used by coaches and parents. And, who ultimately gets to decide what way is "right" and what way is "wrong?"

Doug Romrell said:

Who gets to decide if one way or the other is the "RIGHT" way?

Every one of us has invoked the words, "This is the 'right' way to do it!" at one point or another, probably many different times. More and more this is bothering me. There are lots of ways to do thing, but who ultimately gets to decide what the "right" way is?

As travel-ball coaches, we'd all like to think what we teach is the "right" way, yet other, very good coaches, often argue another way is the "right" way.
We parents of players know of instances when what we've taught is, in our minds, the "right" way, only to have a travel-ball or high school coach argue that another way is the "right" way and what we teach is "wrong."

Quite frankly, I think the work "right" is invoked far too often, kind of like our children whining that something isn't "fair." Whatever does the word "fair" mean.

My question is this.... Do you agree that the words "the right way" are over-used by coaches and parents. And, who ultimately gets to decide what way is "right" and what way is "wrong?"

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I would agree that the right way is over used. Rarely is there a definitive, absolute right way. However, there is often a better way and certainly many a wrong way.

As to the word fair, that is way too often misconstrued to be synonymous with equal.

I try not to use that phrase if possible. Usually I will say something along the lines of "This is what you are doing when doing X. This is what I teach and then explain to them the reasoning behind why I feel it's a better way to do X." This way, at least I give them the choice of trying it my way if it makes sense to them or keep doing what they're doing.

The HC's philosophy in any program has to be the guiding beacon in determining both right and better. Assistants are there to hopefully provide other perspectives, but ultimately, the right way of doing something is decided by the head coach and even then, there will be times when HCs will have to modify their methods and strategies based on the personnel they have to work with.

It can be tough to hash out all the possible scenarios, but if the HC is able to select a knowledgeable coaching staff that's on the same page as they are, that can be the foundation for a very successful program. It doesn't mean they'll agree on everything or even that they will still share similar philosophies after a season or more together, but it provides a great starting point.

If we're talking about a larger organization, then hopefully the organizational leadership does exhaustive interviews with and research on prospective HCs before bringing them aboard.

riseball said:

I would agree that the right way is over used. Rarely is there a definitive, absolute right way. However, there is often a better way and certainly many a wrong way.

As to the word fair, that is way too often misconstrued to be synonymous with equal.

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And the words "that's the wrong way to do it" is all too often used by coaches (or even parents) trying to establish themselves as being better, or more qualified to say.

Lately, with the girls I work with, I've been trying to avoid the words "right" and "wrong." Given these girls are 16ish, I brain-storm with them using reasons for doing this or that, as opposed to "He/she told you to do WHAT?" OR "THAT is wrong."

I've been working very hard with one of my players on both her hitting and her pitching. She's got what I call "lazy legs," and it really affects her pitching power and hitting mechanics. One of the best things I suggested she do is to use the leg work Hugo uses. Just today I advised her that she'll be batting third in the batting order now. She's gone from one of my weakest hitters who always chipped down through the ball to one of my most consistent hitters, particularly in practice (front-toss). This Hugo style lower half is not absolutely "right" for all players, but this girl believes it's "right" for her. And, she'll take a lot of flack for it in high school softball next spring (i.e., she'll be told over and over again that it's "wrong"). However, this kid is tough about holding on to what SHE believes is right for her. She and I have worked hours and hours on end. It wasn't until I saw the Hugo clips here that made me realize that this lower half style was what lazy legs needed to build a timing mechanism and initiate better use of her hips. It's been awe inspiring to see her improvement. But it's been much more inspiring to see the look on her face as she pounds the ball in the batting cage with confidence now.

Ultimately, who gets to decide what is the "right" way? Well, it isn't necessarily a HS coach, a TB coach or parent that proclaims it. Not given how over-used it is. What's right for one kid won't necessarily be right for another.

These words "the right way" should be used FAR LESS that they are used by people, especially when the player is having to obey two masters, as in HS and TB, where ideas about "right" and "wrong" ways to do things vary a great deal.

Unfortunately some of the shenanigans taught by REC/HS coaches simply will not work in TB and certainly not in college. Some coaches teach to the level of the competition with the goal of success at that level. Just as in the classroom, HS ball is often dumb'd down to the lowest common denominator. They are not concerned with anything beyond their immediate sphere of influence. Others coach to develop the best player possible enabling them to compete at the highest level possible.

Yet, most coaches believe what they are teaching is "the right way." But look at how many of us have found better ways here on this site, which means what we originally thought was "right" wasn't really "right" after all. This is why I'm trying to avoid invoking the word "right."

Yes the "right" way is overused. I like to use words like, more efficient or quicker or powerful, balanced. I also don't use "good job" or "good work". Instead I'm very direct, " Mary, I like that you're catching the ball with 2 hands". This gives them the positive comment that's also reaffirms a specific action.

If you have been around the game and for that matter life for a while, you eventually evolve and realize just how much you don't know. As such when someone states that their way is the right way it comes across a both naive and quite arrogant.

riseball said:

If you have been around the game and for that matter life for a while, you eventually evolve and realize just how much you don't know. As such when someone states that their way is the right way it comes across a both naive and quite arrogant.

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riseball, I have concluded that you are a brotha from a different motha!

Personally, I think it's more often arrogance that makes a person naive--too stubborn to see that someone else might actually have knowledge or reasoning beyond your own. I think humility in this regard is almost non-existent.