Unsportsmanlike Conduct?

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Jun 1, 2015
500
43
Interesting (though all-too common) situation. We play in a summer league, ASA rules except for the following:
- 7 innings or 1:45 time limit (not drop dead - finish the inning as needed)
- Start of this game is at 6:02pm, 1:45 takes us to 7:47pm. This was agreed upon at the pre-game conference.
- We are the home team - this is a regular season game, not a tournament.

Top of 6th inning, score tied 10-10. Visiting team fails to score. Home half BEGINS at 7:42pm. My team gets up - eventually pulls ahead 11-10. 3rd out is recorded. I ask the field umpire (with the official time) for her time. She says, "7:47pm coach." I say, "Then that's game - started at 6:02 plus 1:45 makes 7:47", then had my girls line up. Visiting HC comes from his dugout to argue with me/field umpire, claiming that the game started on the first pitch and not the meeting (that we had agreed upon in our league meeting - my girls are warming up regardless). We go through the lineup and shake hands - visiting HC does not shake hands. We clean up, post-game talk as always, then head out.

This morning, I received an email from the visiting HC that says the following:
""Hi XXXXXXX. I just wanted to thank you for that fine lesson in sportsmanship last night. I know it taught both teams some valuable lessons about life and people. You and I both know what you said in the coaches meeting at the beginning of that game - I believe it was something along the lines of "6:02, 6:04, whatever", although obviously the umps didn't - or were just way more concerned with getting their $40 and getting the hell out of there. I made sure to explain to my girls that some people are way more concerned with the score of a kids game than about teaching most important parts of the game, which are the bigger life lessons like working as a team, integrity, sportsmanship and fair play. I also teach them not to be doorstops and to fight when they are wronged. I also told them to smile and hold their heads high knowing it is better to play the game right and keep our dignity than to act like a weasel to "win" a kids game. You can reply to this if you like, but I will not read it and you can just know that my only reply would be "whatever lets you sleep at night". Thanks"

Mind you, I'm not offended by what was said - however according to everything I've said, was anything I did considered "unsportsmanlike" in any manner? Nothing else was said to this HC or his players at all, and we were abiding by the same rules this league has had since at least when I joined 3 years ago.

EDIT: For the record, I'm not looking for sympathy or anything like that. Just a clarification if anything I did would be looked at in the softball community as "unsportsmanlike". I'm a 3rd year coach, so I always want to improve what I'm doing to be a model for my girls.
 
Last edited:
Nov 26, 2010
4,784
113
Michigan
Funny how the coaches who say that someone else is too concerned about winning a game. Are usually the ones who just lost and are upset about it.

Why would an ump in a timed game not have a timer?
 
Jun 27, 2011
5,089
0
North Carolina
I say, "Then that's game - started at 6:02 plus 1:45 makes 7:47", then had my girls line up.

Based on how you describe it here, it sounds like you are telling the umpire that the game is over. Why does she need help with that? Maybe the opposing coach saw this as you running over the umpire.

But in any event, I see nothing in your description that is any excuse for the incredibly unsportsmanlike and cowardly email he sent you.
 
Jun 1, 2015
500
43
Why would an ump in a timed game not have a timer?

They typically just use their cell phone vs. a stopwatch or something like that. I record all of the times in my scorebook in pen just so I can't be accused of cheating or making things up. I wasn't per se telling the umpire the game was over. I was telling my girls the game is over based on what the ump said and what I had recorded in my book. If I was wrong, I would expect the umpire to tell me.
 
Jun 12, 2015
3,848
83
I don't get why the ump didn't have a timer. It beeps and you know the game is over. Then there's nothing to debate or get upset about.
 
Jun 1, 2015
500
43
See my above post. Field ump DID have their phone (which I did witness was checked every inning). Most in this area don't ever worry about it because the only time we have time limits on games is during summer leagues (or fall/winter ball, if they officiate for those).
 
Jun 27, 2011
5,089
0
North Carolina
Again, I see nothing that you did nothing that was deserving of the kind of response you got.

But since you're looking for feedback on what possibly could've set him off, I can see how it might be annoying to the losing coach if you tell (don't ask, but tell) the umpire (making an argument, as it were) that the game is over. That's her job to say the game is over. It's appropriate to ask, but the way you did it might've come off as, ''Time's up, we win.'' Better to let the umpire declare you the winner, IMO.

I wasn't there, of course. Might not be reading this correctly at all. But it's a question of whether the other coach grossly overreacted to something very small, or flipped out over absolutely nothing at all.
 
Jun 1, 2015
500
43
Seems reasonable to suggest, absolutely. My girls were fighting hard to win (particularly because we've struggled against lesser teams as this game was against. This was a battle of 3-4 (us) vs. 2-6 (them) (before the start of the game)), so when I heard 1:45 and we were ahead, my response was largely out of that thinking: "Game's over, we won, let's get the Hell out of here so we don't run the risk of blowing it." I believe this coach was more under the impression the time of the game started with the first pitch, when we agreed the time we started was the time we said (6:02pm - first pitch probably occurred around 6:04pm). That's not under MY control, so him getting all bent out of shape, I felt, was ridiculous. THEN to state I was unsportsmanlike when he didn't even go through the handshake line (as I did) and to state all that he preaches that I allegedly don't (since I'm just concerned with "winning a kids' game") is a load of hot, steaming garbage.
 

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