Parent and Player Question

I don't know how any of these pitchers handle the pressure in the circle. My hats off to all of them.

I can't really tell you what I think you should it should not do. But I can give some insight on what had happened.

I was put into a similar situation when I was in little le a gue. I was 12 at the time and was playing third at the time. I remember being given the ball and told to get the last two outs. I got the first batter I faced. Walked the second batter as well as the third. So bases loaded I had to face their best hitter and they crushed a 0-2 change down the left field line scoring both.

I was crushed after that loss. My coach told me that I pitched well and I have nothing to be ashamed of. I felt better but nothing took away that sting.

I would talk to the player. Explain to her that you have faith in her and wouldn't have put her in if you didn't think she could do it.

CoachKevin said:

I would say yes and no... I do believe you need to address the parent about taking her DD away from the team meeting. This is unacceptable. I agree I wouldn't address the coaching decision with the parent at all, but I would talk to the pitcher and let her know you believe in her, that is why you put her in. And you still believe in her and would do the same thing again. Bottom line, the team didn't score enough runs.

Question to you though. You had a 1st and 3rd situation with 2 outs. Did you just allow the runner to go to 2nd uncontested?

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Yeah, I focused on the parent only concerning the coaching decision. I agree that the coach needs to address the parent about grabbing her kid, and I agree that the coach needs to confirm total confidence in the player but I would suggest that to be done before she entered the circle, not after the fact, and if the situation goes downhill just smile at the kid and let her know it's only a game and not the end of the world.

I would talk to the child to see if she is really "emotionally scarred" from the situation. If she is, then I would have second thoughts about the kid. Pitching is not for the weak. If she pitches and the team loses, the newspaper puts in a big "L" her name...even if the team loses because of a dropped third strike.

If the kid is saying "Oh well, things happen. I'll do better next time," then I wouldn't have second thoughts about her.

The mom...what can you do? She loves her child, but she doesn't understand sports. I would evaluate whether she is going to be "that mother" or can learn to leave it alone.

CoachKevin said:

I would say yes and no... I do believe you need to address the parent about taking her DD away from the team meeting. This is unacceptable. I agree I wouldn't address the coaching decision with the parent at all, but I would talk to the pitcher and let her know you believe in her, that is why you put her in. And you still believe in her and would do the same thing again. Bottom line, the team didn't score enough runs.

Question to you though. You had a 1st and 3rd situation with 2 outs. Did you just allow the runner to go to 2nd uncontested?

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No they stole second and scored on a base hit and a dropped ball on a play at the plate.

Sometimes the parents are more of a emotional wreck after a big loss than the players. Maybe she thought she was doing the right thing by removing her DD from the situation after the game? Bottom line for me is as a coach, I would talk with the parent first and find out if she lost her "emotional intelligence" after the game. If she regrets her actions and expresses that fact, hopefully it will not happen again. If she is in the car driving home telling her DD "I can't believe your coach put you in that situation", you're toast anyway. She is doing more damage to her DD confidence and psyche that you ever will as her coach.

Your player will be much easier to talk with. Look her in the eye and tell you to trust her and if you had the same situation, you would go to her again. I would ask if she is good with you putting her in that situation again, if she gives you the "yes coach", all good. If not, now you know and get her to the point that she does want the ball next season.

It makes it hard that the season is over but I think it would be a mistake to not call the parent. I would want to clear the air so you know where you stand or if you need to find a replacement pitcher for next season.

How old are the girls? If HS...don't say a word to the parent. If younger, you need to tell the parent that it's totally unacceptable to pull her kid before the team meeting, unles youwere notified ahead of time or an emergency arose. Next time you see the kid, tell her you're sorry her mom felt that way, but let her know that you think she gave you the best chance of winning. PERIOD.

DD in HS as freshman playing best team in conf. First P goes to btm half of 6. We are up by 5. Starter has been hit pretty good all game just right to def. Due up btm of 7 is 789 batters. Coach leaves starter in 789 walked in 18 pitches. Put freshman DD with bases loaded no outs and 123 due up. 1 goes down on FC no play at home. Up by 4. 2 hits single up by 3. 3 pops up sac fly up by 2 2 out. 4 dbls and nxt singles and we loose. I was very upset with coaching. 1 give you nxt pitcher a chance to get an out or two against btm of order then hope and pray for something against 1-4 batters. I felt like they put DD behind the 8 ball without much of a chance. I could have strangled coach but instead put the positive spin on it. No BB, got 2 outs, was about the best she could do. I did tell her I would have made the change against btm of order but sometimes coaches make bad decesion and have made my share also. Learn live and move on. I could have lit into coach bur what would it solve.

We have some pitchers that are useless unless they start the inning.

I am guessing it is 12U? Lots of mom and dad drama at that age.
Talk to the player, she is the one on the team, mom is probably not age appropriate to play.

After talking to player-speak to mom about the importance of the '24 hour rule' had she
abided by this-you would not have needed this post. A year from now, that inning will
be a distant memory but you all will remember mom's actions.

Been down that road-it's a pain in the donkey