Struggle Makes You Strong – There’s no doubt this sounds strange since we all hate to struggle at anything but it eventually makes us stronger. Struggle plays a key role in strengthening us mentally by keeping us focused during the struggle and searching for ways to overcome it. Struggle also builds our confidence since we’ll improve our belief in ourselves when we overcome whatever we were struggling with. Struggle on the ballfield plays the same role by building our softball strength (individual or team) as struggle in the weight room. Lifting a heavier weight builds the strength of whatever muscles are lifting it. Struggle against the weight or struggle against the skill improvement all builds strength. So as a coach, notice when your players struggle and help them get themselves through it instead of rushing in and stopping their struggle all together and trying to make it easier for them. You don’t want to leave your players stranded by themselves when they’re struggling since this can completely blow their confidence. Instead, when you notice a player that’s struggling a little bit ask them what is leading to their struggle and what adjustments they need to make to overcome it. Get your player involved in her own improvement instead of expecting you to do the work to fix her. But a word of caution – if your player is struggling a lot and starting to lose all belief in herself then do what you can to help the player keep her confidence as confidence happens before results do. Good coaches know how to stretch their players when they need stretching and how to encourage their players when they need encouraging.
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    Not Everyone Wants It the Same – Since softball takes so many players not all of your players, or teammates will want it the same way so they won’t want to practice the same way either. Believe it or not lots of players practice simply not to mess up while others practice to actually get better. Think about those two things for a second as they are VERY different. The ones that are trying simply not to mess up need you to help them be brave and find some courage to stretch their boundaries a little more, while the ones that really do want to practice to get better need you to help calm them down as they will become frustrated at the drop of a hat. A good coach works hard to find the success in every player and knows that every player doesn’t want it the same way but every player does wants to improve in her own way!
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    Good Can Happen Before 10 – While it’s a good 10 year journey to have a chance at growing your skill to that of an elite player that doesn’t mean you won’t be good before then. Remember that players generally compete against players at or near their same age so everyone in that pool of players have all had about the same amount of practice years.So if you want to be special and get “really good” instead of just good, how do you do that, how do you get ahead? How do players that are around the same age get ahead in regards to skill? You’ve got to put in more time – more time in the bullpen, more time in the batting cage, more time on the ballfield or the weight room or the filmroom or the gym or all of the above. And you’ve got to put more into your time. You’ve got to challenge yourself in practice and stretch your skill instead of practicing the things you already do well. Spend more time practicing your weaknesses as these will be what limit you as you improve in skill. Putting in more time and more into your time is your only shortcut to success, and since doing so isn’t easy it’s why most people in your age groups won’t still be there when all of your work is done.
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    Commitments Matter – Period! If you’re going to commit to playing on a team then play on that team, don’t quit at the first sign of limited playing time. You knew the coaches’ daughter was also a pitcher before you agreed to play on that team so why does that surprise you now? It shouldn’t. Maybe the coaches’ daughter is getting to pitch more than you because the coach plays favorites but maybe the coaches’ daughter gets to pitch because she actually practices more and is better under pressure. Maybe, but not always. Sure, you might get into a situation that ends up not being so great and my advice might be harsh but I think you keep practicing. You keep trying to earn a spot or improve yourself as if it’s up to you to fix things and then you change after the seasons over. You don’t quit. Hopping teams is a big thing now and it only teaches players to take the easy path, to quit when things get tough and to blame someone else for your failure. Those aren’t strategies that will serve kids well as adults when their boss makes life tough, or they get assigned to the not-so-great location, or they have to work their butts off for little pay. We all know those are very real job realities and part of playing sports as a kid is learning lessons for life. Let’s help be a part of teaching our players how to get stronger and tougher through challenges by making commitments and then working hard to keep them! We all know it’s worth it!

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