Stick it out or move on after season?

To me it depends on the kid's personality and age. Some kids would find that situation discouraging and eventually lose interest. Personally I want my kid on a team where she's top 7. I don't need or even want her to be top dog on the team but I want her to play. She wants to play. She'd hate being on a team with a lot of sitting the bench. If we found ourselves on a team where her experience and/or talent lagged significantly I'd want to step it down a bit. Mine is only 10 though, and barely 10 at that. What she likes is being a starter. So #1 or #2 pitcher, and some starting position so that she's not a regular on the bench. And top half of the lineup so if they bat 9, she's in that 9 every time. JMO. That doesn't mean I don't think they should have to work hard. My kiddo works her butt off and loves it. I just prefer her to not be so outclassed we risk giving her a complex. lol

I love a rigorous practice (as does the kid) but crying and puking does not sound like much fun.

UglySport said:

Daughter has played ball for 8 years to include all stars. Has always been the top 3 player. Everyone kept pushing us to TB. Didn't know anything about TB. This is my daughters first real year of TB & she has went from Top dog to puppy pooch. This was expected since she actually landed an "A" class team mostly based off of her determination, willingness, effort, love for sport & etc... She is surrounded with girls that is much bigger, stronger & have been playing TB for years. She gets to play a few innings of the pool games & usually subs as a runner for pitcher/catcher during bracket but has yet to swing a bat during a bracket. She is not up to par in any aspects compared to the other girls but making gains. My biggest concern is that even if her team has 10+ players the coach continues to pick up any better players from any team & play them over the girls that are actually on the team. Some days I tell myself she will benefit from playing with a better team & eventually get there. Other days I feel that she had rather play for a lesser team to see more playing time. The coaching she receives is spot on & couldn't ask for better. However, there is constant & continuous pressure for her to get better, faster. I don't want her to burn out since between practice & private lessons she is involved 5 days a week not counting 6 if there is a game/tournament. I have asked her if she would rather play for a lesser team to get more playing time or had she rather play with a better team. She states to stay with her current team because of the obvious reasons. However, I know the pressure to become better faster is a huge burden & the lack of playing time is bothering her. Has anyone else been in this situation & what do you recommend? What was your experience? What do you recommend?

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Now having a season under your belt you have a better idea of what travel ball is like and so does you DD. Lots of people have been in this situation - you are not alone.

We wouldn't stay because bringing players in to play over regulars is always a classless move at almost every level and it clearly tells you that they are all about winning right now - forget your DD. My DD wants to PLAY, not watch - especially not watch some non-teammate play in her place.

That said, if she wants to stay and is enjoying it - great for the most part. If she isn't getting playing time, then see if you can't guest play yourself on weekends you are not playing. Get some more game time that way. Personally I always liked to play, so maybe there is a better option out there and you find it this way. It doesn't hurt to look.

As a first year you should also be aware that when tryouts start - and that isn't far off now - there is a pretty good chance she wont be invited back. Most coaches expect that the bottom few players on the team will turnover most seasons. Guess who will be invited - yep, some of those guest players they have been bringing in.

grcsftbll said:

I love a rigorous practice (as does the kid) but crying and puking does not sound like much fun.

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Where's did that come from? Need to read read all the posts.

I'd like to play myself, you have an idea what they do do it your self and find a team to play on.

quincy said:

DD does not get to hung up on games, she wants to play though.

Practice is were work is, might take a little bit. She will catchup.

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Thanks for the kind words!

Hard for me to read so many people think it is a better option to quit the current team to find a team this kid could start for. Forget softball. What does that teach the kid? So in a few years this kid starts college and she finds out it is a little tougher then she thought. Would your advice be the same? Should she quit her current school and find an easier school, or work a little harder?

Snotbubbles said:

Ladies and gentlemen we have a winner. This x1000.

Why put in the time and effort to get better only to sit on the bench. There's a team for every player, find the right one.

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Thanks for the obvious advice. I would like to believe every parent tries to find a team that fits the child just as we were hoping for. Sometimes it's a difficult task. My daughter don't play TB just for the sake to surpass time or to keep herself busy. She loves the sport & all that goes along with it. If you ask her what she wants to be for a living she will tell you to play for a college, become a coach or even open her on facility. However, she is still a young teenager & those desires/dreams may not come true. She is intelligent enough to understand that though she may not get the game time she wants; the practice time is evolving her to become a better player. A better player through practice with this team than what I could find within a hours drive. Why does the coach keep her? She is 5'5' & 97lbs., runs like a deer, steals bases well, listens/takes instructions well, has a passion for the sport, sees improvement will run until the others are lying on the ground, don't provide excuses, dedicated to the sport, practices on her on time, doesn't know the definition of "quit" or good enough, & very determined. However, she is still a very young teenager that is ignorant to the ways of the world and needs adult guidance to get her to reach her goals. Unfortunately her father doesn't have the answer for her which is why I'm using this forum to reach out to others that have been there. Rode the ride, wore, the hat & T-shirt. You can put in time & effort in hopes to become better but, never get better. I see this happen to certain teams year after year. You see an important lesson is "Never Confuse Effort with Success". I appreciate all the helpful comments. I believe I will just sit back and support her until she either becomes good enough to start or decides to move on. I guess by letting her make her on decision she could never point fingers at me down the road. Thanks to all for your help!

Mars dad said:

Hard for me to read so many people think it is a better option to quit the current team to find a team this kid could start for. Forget softball. What does that teach the kid? So in a few years this kid starts college and she finds out it is a little tougher then she thought. Would your advice be the same? Should she quit her current school and find an easier school, or work a little harder?

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Agreed & Great point!

I guess I'm in the minority here. If DD wanted to stay on that team then that's what we would do. It's a pretty big stretch to go from rec to A ball, but obviously she must have some talent if she made the team over other girls that probably do have travel ball experience on some level. Maybe the coaches are trying to get her acclimated to A ball rather than just throwing her to the wolves so to speak. Talk to the coaches and see what they envision the next year being for your DD. The good thing is that she is contributing to the team and working to improve her game. I would think as the year goes on that would lead to more playing time.

It is also fine to ride it out this year and see what happens. Also don't get hung up on their being a "right" answer that someone can provide you. As long as there is no abuse physical or emotional there is not only "one" easy solution. Many on here have been in these situations have stayed and many have left in both scenarios some regretted it and others never looked back and there are tons variables that even being right there you are not sure about, just make sure she keeps working and keeps having fun.