Team player vs being taken advantage of?

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Jun 12, 2015
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83
Sidetrack here, sorry - ITA about letting girls deal with coaches when they're able. What age do you think that should start? At what age should parents completely butt out, in your opinion?
 
Jan 4, 2012
3,852
38
OH-IO
Life Lessons... DD got on a semi-local team who contacted me in the Spring.... Got into a non-team issue. Said she wanted to quit. I agreed. I had a $250 deposit. Because it was a non-team adult issue, I handled the Coach. We split the lose.... she still has 4 more times to mow. :cool:

She got on another team right after that... played & liked it... on the way home of last tourney, she said she wanted to go back next year...& text the Coach. When time for fall practice came around, I contacted Coach, and told him she wasn't going to play Fall ball , but was going to work as always on her skilz thur the winter, then school ball, and we would be there first summer practice... Coach said she already committed, and that wasn't an option... LOL... I said...thx anyway. DD don't have the money in her piggy bank. She isn't interested in the fundraising required to play for them.... She is just going to find a situation where I will continue to Sponsor her. :cool:
 
Sep 29, 2014
2,421
113
As a parent - where is the line between having your kid be a "team player" and being taken advantage of?
I've always heard that you want your kid to be a team player, and do what is best for the team, but I'm struggling here...

DD is 12, she is playing on a 1st yr 14s team because she has been with the same coach for 4 years and really likes him and he decided to move the team up. She is fully capable of playing with this team. She is a catcher. She works hard at her position, catching for several pitchers outside of team practices and taking advantage of every opportunity she can to learn and grow. She is a great athlete and has a great work ethic. She is hands down the best catcher on this team. HC knows it and states it regularly.

The problem? He cleaned house this summer and picked up 7 new players (some of our team stayed down and some needed to go)(Team of 12 girls). He picked up all infielders - on purpose according to him. He said he wants athletes and to make sure the girls work hard and compete for their positions. He said if he has good athletes he can turn some of them into outfielders. Sounds good in theory, but he has basically no outfielders. His DD will play outfield occasionally. My problem? DD is a great outfielder as well. She is fast and can track a ball. Plus she has a cannon for an arm. He has been putting her in the outfield pretty regularly now. The girls he has catching are slow and don't know the game from behind the plate. It is hard to watch. I know in his mind he's doing what he thinks is best for the team because we need girls who can catch in the outfield, but it is also hurting us not having DD behind the plate - and she misses it.

DD has always had a good attitude and plays where he wants her. I am frustrated because I feel like she has worked hard over the past 4 years to establish herself as a catcher. I feel like she is being punished because HC made a poor decision in not picking up any outfield. DD's theory is - I would rather play (anywhere) than sit the bench. But she is getting frustrated with wanting to catch as well. She sees that we are losing games on steals home all.day.long. She doesn't mind playing outfield sometimes - she rather enjoys it actually, but she wants to catch more than just an inning here and there.

So - where is the line between being a team player and being taken advantage of?

If these are true and not just rose colored glasses it sound like your DD needs to step up in competition. She is the best outfielder and best catcher?, you said she slaps what is her actual average, if she is a natural lefty she should be power slapping and punching balls in the gap after infield comes in and outfield goes to sleep. For the fall just let the coach know as the #1 catcher (his words) she needs half the innings behind the plate to keep up her skills. I would be thinking about moving in the spring if things don't improve you said he always had good teams but then dumped 7 players, assuming these was mostly an age out thing? Just does not make sense if he is as good a coach as you say unless he is really just using fall ball as development only which is OK but he needs to be up front and should still have a few innings or half games where he puts his best line up out there and see how they work together.
 
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Apr 26, 2015
704
43
So...little follow up. I think the coach finally saw the light. DD played a tournament this weekend and there was no question who his #1 was. DD was amazing. She is the smallest girl on this team but so tough mentally and physically. Out of 17 innings DD caught 12. She was a beast. She caught one foul pop up, had 1 throw down out to 2nd and one to 1st and a tag at home saving a homerun. This girl bowled DD over and got up so excited screaming "I'm safe, I'm safe - she dropped the ball.". Dd just held out her hand with the ball in it. Out! One of the moms said all she could think was "on my gosh our catcher is going to be broken!" when she saw the collision. But DD popped right back up and got back to work.

Her slapping this weekend was pretty good too. She lead off 2x - out of 4 games and hit 2nd in the other 2 games. She got on base every at bat (yes at least once due to throwing errors on the other team - but we'll still take it!), and had 2 legit power slaps for doubles. She is starting to read the defense really well and she has learned to drop it in the gap when everyone is sneaking in. It's fun to watch as last year she bunted a lot but never slapped so the teams we played in the past expect her to just lay down a bunt and then she slaps it past them. She drove in a couple runs too. She has a LONG way to go, but had a good weekend for a beginner!

There are 4 HS girls on this team who have been unable to play with us due to HS ball, but they all came out today to watch. One of the moms commented to our coach that she thought DD caught as good or better than most of the HS catchers they played against. I was not there for the convo - the coach relayed that info to us later.

When DD wasn't catching she was in CF. It's interesting to watch how the defense adjusts based on who is in the OF. DD is good at directing traffic out there and helps the girls know where and when to back up.

In answer to the question above with needing a large number of girls - yes - most of it was due to aging up. There were 2 girls who were poison to the team and needed to go. This team has alot of growing to do...
 
Jul 26, 2016
108
18
Is she a left handed thrower?

If she is on the smaller side but super fast and more of a for average hitter maybe playing CF really would be a better Chance to Play college especially as a lefty. she probably is a good catcher and likely the best of her Team but Scouts value Speed at CF higher than at C.

does she have a measurable plus arm or just for her Level? from what I have read CF is not the worst Position for her.
 
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JAD

Feb 20, 2012
8,231
38
Georgia
There is a fine line between being a team player and being taken advantage of, and the line is different for everyone...bottom line, if you THINK your DD is being taken advantage of, it may be a good time for a heart-to-heart conversation with the coaches.
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
7,132
113
Dallas, Texas
DD is a great outfielder as well. She is fast and can track a ball. Plus she has a cannon for an arm. He has been putting her in the outfield pretty regularly now.

I'm really confused...because the coach sounds to me to be completely reasonable.

Your DD is a great outfielder with a rocket launcher for an arm. She is apparently fast since she is a leadoff slap hitter.

Why do you want her to catch?

I'm not sure how big your DD is...but, D1 coaches favor big girls behind the plate.
 
Feb 20, 2015
643
0
illinois
Agree with Ray. My DD is very similar to your DD. (except being left handed) Fast, can track balls down in the outfield and has a good arm. She also loves playing catcher. While I would not say my DD is a great catcher, that is what she loves to do. She was lucky enough to be on a team this summer where she split catching time evenly with the other catcher. When she wasn't catching, she was center fielder. (short/second every once in a while) Dont under estimate the importance of a good center fielder, especially at 14U and older.
 

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