How do families do it ?

I ran into a potential dilemma this weekend. Both girls currently play with the same org and we love the org, but lil DDs 10U squad is short quite a few players and it doesn't look like they will get any games for at least a few months and the full squad may not come together at all. We like it because the coaching staff is top notch and she gets a lot of reps and individual attention but the lack of games is something that is not ideal. So I started looking around to see what other options there were. Part of this was to see what was out there, part to see how she stacked up, not really because we want to leave but wanting to make sure we had a good sense of the options. I figured we might as well see what she's got so I inquired with one of the top orgs (we are talking multiple PGF champs at various age levels) that happens to be 20 minutes away and found they were looking for a couple more 2004s and invited her out to workout with the team.

Holy crap, it is no wonder these girls turn into softball machines. The workout was so precise, so detailed oriented and so long that my head was spinning just envisioning the commitment it would take from the family if she were to join up. They work out for 4 hours on Saturdays and Sundays plus a 3 hour conditioning and hitting workout during the week. They had the groups cycling in right on time, the 14s were practicing when we showed up and at the allotted time they left the field and the 10s immediately took the field. The tone, drills and expectations for the 10s was identical to the older girls, no babying going on there. The orgs pres oversaw the practices at every level.

Really impressive org, but I just kept trying to figure out what life would look like if she were to be offered a spot and took it. EVERY weekend we would be splitting up to get them to different practices/friendlies etc. How do families do this? Even if both girls were on this team it would still mean every weekend basically all day at practice.

Luckily we don't have to make the decision just yet, the workout was just fielding/base running and they want to see her hit at the next workout before making a decision. She did well, could definitely play with those girls, but I can't quite wrap my head around the commitment it would take from the entire family.

Maybe this solves itself and she doesn't make the squad, but if she is offered a spot, it is going to be a really tough decision, because I know she would become an incredibly well rounded player with this org and be on a path to have a really good chance to be competing for national championships on a consistent basis, but I also know that nothing would be getting done around the house and she would miss out on a lot of kid stuff.

For her part, she is all gung ho about it and says that she can handle the practices, but I have my reservations about how she will feel the first time she has to turn down a birthday party at DISNEYLAND and go to practice.

she will be hitting a lot this week in preparation for the workout though

Talk with her about it. Make sure she understands what the commitment means - up side and down side - and what your expectations of her will be (school, etc.). It's a full-family commitment that will significantly change your current routine. For yourself, keep in mind how it will affect your own relationship with DW, and how it will affect things for your other DD. This is a step that EVERYONE has to be on board with (IMO, YMMV).

Good luck.

A dilemma indeed, JJ. My DD is now 2nd year 12U in an impressive organization similar to what you described. Anywhere between 3 and 6 teams of the org rotating stations like clockwork on 2 or 3 fields. One of DDs teammates has a sister on 14U. Another two other teammates have sisters on 10U, 14U, and 16U (four girls in each of those two families!). My DD is at the point for the past year I drop her off and pick her up because my son often has conflicting commitments. But the families with four girls sometimes do a drop off, and sometimes tag team with the other parent.

My DD had a great pitching lesson last night after her Sunday morning team practice. Her PC agrees with me that there is no substitution for game experience.

Given that, I hope you find a situation good for your DD and your family.

JJsqueeze said:

EVERY weekend we would be splitting up to get them to different practices/friendlies etc. How do families do this?

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You just do it. My kids are just playing rec ball (DD softball, DS baseball) and even with a time commitment that's nowhere near that of TB, we have a lot of conflicts during the season. You split up a lot. You carpool. You make it work. Right now, DD's games are Saturdays (doubleheaders half the time) and DS' games are Sundays 40 minutes away. So there's no conflicts, but it's 6 or 7 weekends where nothing else happens.

This is the "professionalism" of youth sports that Dr Andrews warns against in his recent article on sports. This practicing as if these children are already adults.

So to answer your question, how do families do it. If you have more then one child involved this much in one activity it becomes easy to juggle, as long as they stagger their repetitive motion injuries you will only have to worry about getting one to practice and games at a time. Plus usually PT appointments are on weekdays so those don't get in the way.

Did you also already find out what the fees for that were? the local team that I know of that sounds similar was about double what I was expecting to hear, and then the travel on top of that cost about tripled the total. Maybe in your area the travel wouldn't be as necessary, plus being 10U maybe it would be a little bit better. Might be hard to send them off to away tournaments by themselves because you are in another city with other DD though too - although that can happen at any level of TB.

It is good you are seriously thinking about this. It is a big commitment, and something you should think about.

How do families do this?

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You give up everything other than sports.

Even if both girls were on this team it would still mean every weekend basically all day at practice.

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Well, for your girls, not necessarily for you.

Also, your DDs aren't going to have serious emotional problems if you miss a few games. It is actually good to miss some games. They need to learn that they don't need you.

but I can't quite wrap my head around the commitment it would take from the entire family.

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It is a big decision. Your family has really think about whether this is something they want.

but I also know that nothing would be getting done around the house

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An organization like the one you describe is not going to let you get near a ball or bat...you have no duties or responsibilities at the practice.. So, you could drive up to the facility, drop her off, and go do something else.

and she would miss out on a lot of kid stuff.

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1) She doesn't think of it that way. She thinks of practice as "play". So, to her, she gets to play every Saturday for a few hours. (Goes back to the idea that a kid has to really love softball in order to be "good".)

2) Until she hits HS, she will basically do the "kid's stuff" with the team. At HS, the kid's stuff becomes much more manageable since everyone only has the evenings free.

Classof2020 said:

Did you also already find out what the fees for that were? the local team that I know of that sounds similar was about double what I was expecting to hear, and then the travel on top of that cost about tripled the total. Maybe in your area the travel wouldn't be as necessary, plus being 10U maybe it would be a little bit better. Might be hard to send them off to away tournaments by themselves because you are in another city with other DD though too - although that can happen at any level of TB.

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The fees are surprisingly reasonable. In line with all the other orgs in our area. I was pleasantly surprised that there wasn't a premium there.

JJsqueeze said:

The fees are surprisingly reasonable. In line with all the other orgs in our area. I was pleasantly surprised that there wasn't a premium there.

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Did the fees include the midweek conditioning and hitting workout? There are often additional costs involved with them.

Classof2020 said:

Did you also already find out what the fees for that were? the local team that I know of that sounds similar was about double what I was expecting to hear, and then the travel on top of that cost about tripled the total. Maybe in your area the travel wouldn't be as necessary, plus being 10U maybe it would be a little bit better. Might be hard to send them off to away tournaments by themselves because you are in another city with other DD though too - although that can happen at any level of TB.

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The fees will not be significantly different. Down here, you don't need to travel all that much (if at all) to be playing the best competition in the country every weekend. For the most part, we just travel for the sake of traveling ..... more to see how the girls handle that experience and maybe to play a few different teams and maybe get in front of a few different college scouts.